Why I Advocate For Sex Toys in the Bedroom

You meet someone new and sparks are flying. You can't keep your hands off of each other. You shave every crevice of your body before date night and wear the sexiest thing you own (or nothing at all!) under a little black dress.

But this illusion wears off. He sees you in the shower for the first time, eyeliner dripping down your face and hair wet. You hear (and smell) him fart for the very first time. It's wonderful, but comfortable. Sex, too, seems to feel like the same old thing. Yes, it's great, but it becomes routine. And soon it may also be dropping in frequency because, let's face it, life happens.

Soon, you're looking for ways to reignite the spark and the passion. Sure, there are different positions, quickies, sexy lingerie — all of those things are a great help. But, I'm here to tell you that with the right sex toys, that passion will have never left in the first place.

I wasn't always an advocate of sex toys until one day, a vibrator was mailed to me at my place of work. Wanting to spice up my almost nonexistent sex life (that's a story for another day), I took it home and tried it with my live-in boyfriend at the time. It seriously changed my life.

Now, I have quite the collection of toys. Sometimes I use them. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I only use them at the very end for a little orgasm boost. But however they're used, I am never left dissatisfied. So whether you're solo or attached, here are just a few reasons to bring sex toys into your master bedroom.

1. It's exciting

I love telling my current boyfriend that I ordered us a new toy to try. We have riveting conversations about what it is, what it does, where it's coming from, and when it's going to arrive. When it does come, I squeal like a little girl, wash it, charge it, and wait very anxiously for him to get home. I was like this when I would buy something fun just for my own use, too.

2. It keeps things fresh

So, let's get something straight for a minute. A sex toy doesn't have to be something battery operated. These include nipple clamps, handcuffs, paddles, etc. Riding my boyfriend with nipple clamps on gives him a new, fun visual and me a great sensation. It's simple yet very effective. The same goes for cuffs or restraints — no batteries included, but it's an easy way to make plain old missionary (nothing against it, I love it) a bit more thrilling.

3. Orgasms are way better

If you keep eating the same meal, eventually you will get sick of it, right? If you keep having the same kind of orgasm, it's not going to be as good as it used to be. Your body gets used to the way your partner moves or what other things you may have to do to have an orgasm. By using sex toys, your body feels something different every once in awhile, which can help make your orgasms deeper, stronger, and more powerful.

4. It brings you closer

Something that I personally love about the use of sex toys is the way that it brings my boyfriend and I closer and we're more engaged in sex. It's fun to try new toys together, especially ones that benefit both of us. Not only are we focused on our own pleasure, but we spend time asking each other what it feels like, if the other likes the sensation, etc. It actually makes sex a lot more intimate — if it can get any more intimate than that!

5. It allows for exploration

Different toys do different things. They have different bells and whistles that cause different sensations. This allows for both you and your partner to do things that you normally wouldn't. For example, I once dated a man who really loved to spank me. We explored that with a few items and it turned out to be something I like. But there have been toys that haven't lived up to their expectations either. At the end of the day, they allow you to expand your sexual horizons.

6. It keeps the spark lit — near or far

I travel a lot for work and I recently invested in a WeVibe, a"smart" sex toy. There is an app that comes along with it. So if I'm on a business trip across the country and my boyfriend is home, he can literally turn me on from the comfort of his own couch. It's really clutch for times you can't be with each other but still want to maintain that connection. I bet when you get home, you won't be able to keep your hands off each other.