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Arguing in Front of the Children

Do You Argue in Front of the Kids?

"We've been married 40 years and never had a fight." Couples like that are few and far between, if not imaginary. While most folks have a healthy squabble every now and then, many try not to do so in front of the wee ones. Minor disagreements seem harmless and sometimes negligible in the presence of youngsters but when tempers rise and voices escalate, doors are often shut to protect the image of a united front on the parents' behalf. Others prefer their kids to see it like it is and make no effort to mask honest and sometimes harsh conversations. How do you handle arguments at home?

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lickety-split lickety-split 7 years
yes. i think it's important for the kids to see the way you deal with conflict. people disagree and you need to know how to handle yourself and what the limits are for fair communication. if it were to be something big of course i wouldn't do that. i'm mostly referring to things like who should have put the trash out or how much money to spend on a set of tires; little stuff.
keiren63 keiren63 7 years
We try not to argue in front of the kids but sometimes it spills out. First, after the first year or so, the arguments are a heckuva lot less--maybe a big, fat fight once every 18 months or so. Second, it's good for the kids to see that people can have a big blowup--then get past it and be okay. The kids see the fight--but they see the apologies and the recovery. Kids fear the fight behind closed doors where they're not sure what's going on.
grigio12 grigio12 7 years
Rarely, we don't fight often. Occasionally we bicker for a few minutes in front of my son, but we turn it into humor and laughter.
rgrl rgrl 7 years
It's really hard for me to save arguments for behind closed doors. When something bothers me , it bothers me right then and I can't wait for later to resolve it... unfortunately. So I have gotten upset at hubby in front of my kids which I don't think is great. I wish I didn't have a temper.
Danni99 Danni99 7 years
The only things we don't argue about in front of the kids are the kids themselves, and finances. We try to present a united front about parenting stuff, so arguing about parenting decisions in front of them would defeat that. As for money, they are too young to understand the constraints we face, so we try to avoid scaring them.
kurniakasih kurniakasih 7 years
I'm on an ongoing 'battle' about this with my hubby. I'd rather have our big one behind closed door, but he doesn't care that our son gets to see it. The thing about my hub too, he can be a jerk about it and actually 'involved' our son in the argument, basically chiding ME and telling our son how I was acting like a b1tch or something like that. Then that usually got me to lose my control. We hardly argue though, but when we do, that's what happened and it usually goes from normal disagreement to an all out anger fest (from my part).
luckyme luckyme 7 years
Little arguments, yes, we won't hide that from our girls, but full-out fights, nope. I grew up in a house where my parents consistently fought in front of us and it did some damage. I won't do that to my kids. There's no need for them to see that. Fortunately, my husband and I don't really have raging battles often, if ever.
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