17 Profane Doormats Made For Moms Who Really F*cking Hate Visitors
Let's just cut to the chase here, people: moms who curse are the f*cking best. They keep it real, get sh*t done, and don't take life too seriously. To honor all the potty-mouthed mamas out there who aren't afraid to put their colorful vocabularies on display, we're sharing a hysterical gift idea that's perfect for the upcoming holiday season: profane doormats.
Cheeky stepping pads are currently flooding Etsy, each one featuring no-frills sayings like "f*ck off" and "welcome b*tches." They let any potential visitors know they've arrived at a "zero f*cks given" type of household — because sometimes you just have to sit back and let your home decor do the talking. Ahead, shop 17 of the funniest ones we could find.
"Sorry We're Out of F*cks" Doormat
If your mom's neighbors have come looking for their lost f*cks, this "Sorry We're Out of F*cks" Doormat ($42) will notify them that you, too, cannot locate them.
"It's Cozy AF in Here" Doormat
Is this "It's Cozy AF in Here" Doormat ($35) perfect for Winter or what?!
"F*ck Off" Doormat
This "F*ck Off" Doormat ($27) may feature a dainty border and cursive writing, but it still sends a strong message.
"Welcome to the Sh*tshow" Doormat
This "Welcome to the Sh*tshow" Doormat ($35) gives visitors a fair warning of what they're in for before entering your mom's home.
"Just Keep Swimming" Doormat
Dory from Finding Nemo would definitely approve of this "Just Keep Swimming" Doormat ($35), right?
"Coffee, Dog Kisses, & Curse Words" Doormat
There may not be an actual swear word on this "Coffee, Dog Kisses, & Curse Words" Doormat ($40), but it's still on-point.
"I F*cking Hate People" Doormat
Calling all blatantly honest mamas — this "I F*cking Hate People" Doormat ($35) was made for you.
"Welcome B*tches" Doormat
This "Welcome B*tches" Doormat ($35) is about as inviting as it gets.
"No Pricks Allowed" Doormat
This "No Pricks Allowed" Doormat ($32) is the best way for moms to share their No. 1 house rule.
"We Ain't Got Sh*t" Doormat
This "We Ain't Got Sh*t" Doormat ($35) was made for moms who simply don't want to be messed with.
"It's Like a F*cking Zoo in Here" Doormat
All moms who proudly embrace the crazy definitely need this "It's Like a F*cking Zoo in Here" Doormat ($35).
"The Jolliest Bunch of Assholes" Doormat
Ho-ho-holy sh*t, this "The Jolliest Bunch of Assholes" Doormat ($32) is the only holiday porch decoration your mom needs.
"Shoes Off, B*tches" Doormat
Your mom is probably sick of saying it out loud, so get her this "Shoes Off, B*tches" Doormat ($48) to save her from repeating herself.
"Hey F*ckers, Welcome to the Neighborhood" Doormat
If you mom is a fan of the movie Step Brothers, she'll definitely get a kick out of this "Hey F*ckers, Welcome to the Neighborhood" Doormat ($45-120).
"Move, B*tch!" Doormat
This "Move, B*tch!" Doormat ($35) features a famous song lyric from the one and only Ludacris.
"F*ck Off" Doormat
There's no beating around the bush with this straight-to-the-point "F*ck Off" Doormat ($35).
"Asshole Free Zone" Doormat
If your mom has a strict "no assholes in the house" rule, she'll be so excited to receive this "Asshole Free Zone" Doormat ($40) as a gift.