Skip Nav
Saying Your Dog Is Your "Baby" Is an Insult to Moms Everywhere
Mom's Reaction to Holding Her Newborn Rainbow Baby Is So Powerful
This Is What It's Like to Watch Someone Else Deliver Your Baby

Kid's Decision Tree After Sister Hits in the Nose

Kid's "Decision Tree" After Being Hit by Little Sister Is the Definition of 1st Child Syndrome

For many young sibling pairs, if one were to hit the other — even by accident — the other one would either be well on their way to tell mom following initial contact, or immediately pounding their sibling back. But for a kid whose "decision tree" is going viral, there was a third, more bleak option.

Let's back up for a minute.

In a post to the HowToBeADad Facebook page, a "How Would You Decide" worksheet supposedly filled in by a 3-year-old (the kid definitely isn't 3 and everyone in the comments is making sure to note this as well, so let's just agree to ignore that part) is being simultaneously laughed and cringed at due to the young child's, ahem, honest responses.

At the top of the worksheet, the child lists their problem as "My sister socked me in the nose," followed by important information: "My sister is littler, it hurt." From there it only gets more real — and more dark.

Option A: Punch her lights out.
Positive Consequences: I will be happy.
Negative Consequences: I will get in trouble.

Option B: Tell on her.
Positive Consequences: She will get in trouble.
Negative Consequences: I will be a tattletail (sic).

Option C: Lock her in the closet.
Positive Consequences: I will never see her again.
Negative Consequences: I don't see any.

His final choice? Option C, of course.

Although he left the "Factors influencing me" section blank, if this isn't the definition of Oldest Child Syndrome, we don't know what is.

Little Girl Crying Over Waffles Video
Dad Not Embarrassed By Toddler's Whole Foods Temper Tantrum
Best Toys For Toddlers 2018
Day Care Waxes Kids' Unibrows
How to Make Kids Bath Time Easier
Little Girl Reciting Leaders For Black History Month
Stages of Flying With a Toddler
Best Disney Denim at Gap
Hawaiian Airlines Flight Attendant Soothes Toddler on Plane
Why Parents Shouldn't Let Their Kids Be Loud on Planes
From Our Partners
Latest Moms
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds