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Lil Community: I Need Advice

This post was submitted by tink069 in The Pregnancy Posse group.

Okay, so I recently found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend and he says cool and says he would have to get a better car and a better job or a second job and a place for me and him to live. He has also said that he would quit drinking while I was pregnant. Then I tried to talk to him the other day and asked him what he wanted me to do and he said he didn't care it was up to me. I don't know what to do or what he means by that. I don't know if he is scared or what and we haven't talked very much since I found out so I don't know if he is just freaking out cause of this all or what. I told him I didn't want him to resent me and I didn't want to make his life harder and he keeps telling me it is up to me about whether I should keep the baby or not. I don't know what he means. I need advice.

Talk about motherly things on your mind at The Pregnancy Posse group over in the LilSugar Community.

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runningesq runningesq 7 years
Give me a forking break, snowy. "post-christian western world" - really ? Anyhow, to the OP: sounds like you just really need to sit down with him and talk to him. It does sound like you are excited abut the pregnany and want to keep the baby -- so let him know this. I think letting you know that it's your decision is mature on his behalf. Good luck !!
amandachalynn amandachalynn 7 years
Sorry, but people have been having abortion since before the Christian movement. Women in ancient China used mercury, and the herb hellebore was used throughout ancient Egypt and surrounding areas. Abortion is not a new idea, and it has always been the womans choice because they rarely told their men. Anyway, it does sound like you want to keep your baby. You don't want him to resent you, but what about you resenting him? I have a friend who was pregnant around the same time I was, and she chose to have an abortion. Every time she sees my son she makes a comment about her child being the same age. I don't know you so I don't know if you would have the same regret, but it's always good to think about all possible outcomes. Talk to him and get all the info together. Whatever you do please go to your regular medical dr, and not a pregnancy help center. Those places routinely give out incorrect information regarding abortion and birth control. I think tres or lil actually did a piece on it.
snowysakurasky snowysakurasky 7 years
some observations: it seems like you want the baby and you want him to be excited about it. noone should have the right to take lifefrom an innocent being. however in the post-christian western world we are brainwashed to believe that it is a woman's choice and whatever choice is right for her is 'ok' even if its terminating a life. it is a very big thing to have a baby, but you will never regret it. be grateful you have a man who respects you so much. if you were in China or had weird parents and were young, you could be forced into having an abortion against your will. 2 questions: do you see yourself happy in the future with this man? do you know how abortions actually are performed ie what physically happens? ask/find out before not after. its normal for you both to be scared, even when you plan for it (try to get pregnant) being pregnant for the first time is scary and becoming a parent is scary too
senorita senorita 7 years
I think he might just be scared. Definitely try to talk to him again and mention that you are just scared, so he knows he is not alone. Hope that helps!
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