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Lilsugar Poll

Did You Always Have Motherly Instincts?

Some women were born to mother. Others don't feel the maternal urge until much later in life. And of course, there are those that don't want to procreate.

When did you know you wanted to have children?


wasabigizmobunny wasabigizmobunny 9 years
I never wanted kids when I was young. Then I met my husband and he persuaded me to have 1 or 2. Now I have a 10 weeks old and I want 2-3 children. It really is a magical experience and my baby lights up my life :) I am not a sappy person but looking into your child's eyes really brings out those loving mothering instincts!
macneil macneil 9 years
I spent the pregnancy worrying that I wouldn't love her, that I'd ruined my life, and her life-to-be. When she was born, I turned to my husband and said 'I just don't feel anything'. He had spent the pregnancy feeling like me, but as soon as she was born, he was going 'I LOVE HER! I REALLY LOVE HER!' and for a moment, a while, even, I was just feeling nothing at all, I just looked at her and thought, what is she, just this weird scrunchy thing making a rough squeaky noise. Then they all left me alone with her, and it was like my heart started coming alive, and soon after that and forever she's just been the most important thing in my life, more than myself, more than anything. You can't fight it; motherhood is a killer, it changes the way your heart works.
milosmommy milosmommy 9 years
I alway knew I wanted kids. I used to think I wanted 3-4 kids, mostly because I grew up an only child. But now that I have my one son I realize how much work it is and I think 2 will max it out. :)
kiwitwist kiwitwist 9 years
I wanted children when I was a child, you know playing Mommy as a kid. But when I was a teenager I didn't want kids. When I met my hubby I started to want them again. So, I have switched so many times LOL!
mangopassion mangopassion 9 years
Right now my husband and I are both on the fence about the baby thing. I am happy to hear there are some other people out there who don't have the speedy urge to have children. We have been married for two and a half years now and that is all people seem to ask us about, "when are you going to have children?" Honestly right now I think we are both too self involved to honor a child. Now if something were to happen and we got a little "surprise" I am sure we would both love the child to death, but as far as planning for a little one I think we are going to hold off and re-access in a couple years. The best part for me, being almost 28 is my gyno isn't pushing it, she didn't have her kids until she was 32 so she says I have plenty of time yet. How wonderful!
d_ford d_ford 9 years
I wasn't sure on having kids. I thought it was something that I *should* do since most women have children, but I wasn't really into the idea. Coming from divorced parents, I wasn't even keen on the idea of marriage. I thought it was archaic and stupid. It wasn't until I met my husband (go figure!), and when my cousin had a baby that I knew I REALLY wanted kids. My cousin's child, who is almost 3, is the light of my life and he has brought so much joy into my life that I can't wait until I have my own. The moment I laid eyes on him, at 6 days old, and held him in my arms I knew that I was meant to have children and I have been dying ever since. I really respect women who know that they don't want children, however, I would never advocate someone to tie their tubes because you never know how you are going to feel until it happens to you. I remember a friend of my mum's who's wife didn't want children until she got pregnant and had a miscarriage. Now they have two girls. To cut off your own fertility seems drastic and unnecessary when there are so many other options out there. Just because you don't want children now, doesn't mean you won't want them later in life.
ohjeeze ohjeeze 9 years
I always thought that I should have kids to feel complete as a woman but now that I am getting older I am pretty sure that I won't or at least should not have kids. I hate it that society makes women feel like her life is not fullfilled unless she has children. Men never get this kind of pressure.
abqmama abqmama 9 years
I also never wanted kids when I was younger, not at all. In fact, people who see me with my kids now are shocked because they said I was so adamant about not having kids. When my husband and I got married I decided that I wanted two kids. Now that I have three sons, I want a couple more! Of course I have to convince my husband first...
LiLRuck44 LiLRuck44 9 years
I never had any interest in babies when I was little, but when I met my husband I was gifted a stepdaughter and knew I wanted to be a mother. In fact, that's all I want to be. I can't think of anything more meaningful and rewarding than just being a mommy. I love my kids (2 babies in the past three years!) and I will spend a lifetime meddling in their affairs for as long as they will allow it. =)
graceunderfire graceunderfire 9 years
I wanted a big family but have recently decided that I'm not responsible to have any, at least not now.
kikidawn kikidawn 9 years
jessy777, No worries I won't attack! :D You said: " My argument has always been that mothers today have a choice and that is where revolutions comes from." ... I could not agree more! That is exactly how I feel! I have **always** wanted kids and I wanted to law career too... but I know I want to have my kids young and I know it is possible to have both... but I want to be able to see my kids grow up and I don't know if I could personally strike a balance. The more I thought about it I realized that I love working with people and education would give me that chance too. Now that I am in my education classes I couldn't be happier. Kids are still a ways off, but they will be here sooner rather than later ;) You won't believe this... I am high school history too!! :D :cheer: Novaraen, that story about hearing your boys laughing melted my heart. I babysit for a 5 1/2 month old and every time he smiles or giggles I fall in love a little bit more ♥
Novaraen Novaraen 9 years
No one is weird for choosing to be a mom over a fancy career. I think being a mom is one of the most challenging careers we as women can take on in life. Every day is different and also very rewarding and satisfying. :D Yesterday i had my boys giggling up a storm and i stopped to listen to the sound of their laughter and it just amazed me how wonderful it was! Being a mom is the BEST! To answer the above question...i knew i always wanted kids. I didnt know when, but when i got to about 28 years old, i started really thinking about it. I had always said i wanted to have a kid before i was 30....and as it turned out i got pregnant with my twin sons at 29 and had them at 30. :D
jessy777 jessy777 9 years
Kiki, I had an discussion the other day about motherhood and feminism. A friend of mine thinks that stay at home moms push back the revolution (not my opinion, please don't attack). My argument has always been that mothers today have a choice and that is where revolutions comes from. What subject and grade are you hoping to teach? I am high school history.
asco00 asco00 9 years
I never wanted to have children when I was younger, most because I had such a strange view on how people raised children thanks to my parents. I fault them not, now that I have kids I realize it's a tough business. Once I had I my child, it was instant. I wouldn't say I was motherly right off, but I definitely knew it wasn't all about me anymore :)
wonderwoman80 wonderwoman80 9 years
I never liked kids that much but it came on in a wave and now I couldn't be happier. There is nothing like coming home after a long day and seeing that smiling face just happy to see me, no questions asked.
schnappycat schnappycat 9 years
My maternal instincts never really kicked in before I had a baby, and honestly, are just now kicking in that my son is 8 weeks old. Yes, I'm odd. I just never felt that biological urge to have kids (never went gaga over babies, etc.), even though I knew I'd regret not having them and knew I'd love it once I did. It's hard to explain. Like romaniagrl, it was just something natural to do in my marriage (although in our case, not natural at all with IVF) and was just something I always expected I would do. But not necessarily something I was "born" to do or was always dying to do.
ktownpolarbear ktownpolarbear 9 years
i've always taken teh caretaker role or the "mom" role in whatever situation i'm in, so i knew i wanted kids. and they wouldn't have to be biologically mine, i've always wanted to adopt.
Rally-RE Rally-RE 9 years
i'm in awe of my sister and how she juggles her two little ones. i love being an aunt ... but i know motherhood isn't for me.
rgrl rgrl 9 years
To some extent. I always liked babysitting and kids as a girl, now I am very protective as a mom. I wasn't dying to have children, it just came as the natural next step in our relationship. Before marriage I had thought of adoption as a future option too.
wingedkiare wingedkiare 9 years
When I was a kid, I didn't want to have any children at all. Then I turned 16 and said that maybe I'd have one. Then I met my husband and realized that I definitely wanted kids and that I wanted a couple.
Liss1 Liss1 9 years
I have always know that i want to have kids :baby:
MarinerMandy MarinerMandy 9 years
I always thought I never wanted kids. When I was little I never played with dolls or nurtured anything. For some reason I hit 25 and told my fiance that I wanted to have our first kid before we were 30! Just came out of nowhere. Definetely not ready for them yet, but hopefully within the next couple years.
luvhouse07 luvhouse07 9 years
Just not for me..
kikidawn kikidawn 9 years
jessy777, I did exactly what you are talking about. I always wanted to be a lawyer... but now I'm in school for education. The more I think about it the more I realize that I want to be a mother more than anything! I've always known I want kids (ever since I can remember I have loved babies :)) Everyone -- please don't attack me b/c I choose to have kids instead of a law career. Feminism is about having the ability to chose whatever I want for my life. And having kids will make me more happy than anything!! Oh and I don't think it's weird to consider a future family when considering careers ... obviously :D
jessy777 jessy777 9 years
I think my maternal instincts are just kicking in. I find myself thinking about the future and children. Before, I always thought I wouldn't want children. Today I had a conversation about how forgoing law school would be beneficial when I start having children and that a career in education can be more conducive. Is it weird to think about future children when making a career choice? I am not married or even close to it but I do think about these things. Maybe I am strange.
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