Mommy Dearest,

I am due with my first child on Sept. 13 and am completely accepting of the fact that I likely overshoot this due date. My boyfriend has been supportive the entire pregnancy and very vocal about how he wishes to be in the delivery room, which I am happy to hear! Unfortunately his side of the family suffered the loss of grandmother recently. We will attend the memorial service this weekend, but the burial will take place the weekend after my due date.

The place is about six hours away, so I obviously cannot go if I have not given birth yet, but my boyfriend has made it clear that he will go whether the baby is here or not! I am terrified of being alone for the labor and delivery if he cannot make it back in time. My mother will be there for the delivery, but I have always looked at her being there as more of a secondary support person and am counting on my him to be there so we can experience it together. Since it is my first delivery, it may take a long time and he might make it back in time, but that is not a chance I want to take! Am I being selfish for wanting him to stay home from what would be the second memorial service for his grandmother? How do I approach this topic with him?

— Want Boyfriend There For Birth

To see the response from Mommy Dearest,


Want Boyfriend There For Birth,

You are not selfish — you're a soon-to-be mom who wants to experience the birth of her child with the baby's father. It is completely understandable that you wish and rely on him to be present at the life-changing event. I would approach the topic by telling him how you feel and being supportive in regards to him losing his grandmother. You may also consider having other dads talk to him about their birth experiences and why they think it would be appropriate for him to stay home from the burial if it comes to that point. Good luck!


– Mommy Dearest

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