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Parents Decide To Raise Child Genderless

Parents Decide To Raise Child Genderless

One of the first questions that new moms and dads get asked is, "Is it a boy or a girl?," and typically, they're happy to exclaim "it's a --!" But Toronto couple Kathy Witterick and David Stoker are doing things a little differently. They've decided to keep their four-month-old's gender a secret for as long as possible to allow him or her to "discover for him/herself what s (he) wants to be."

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Do you think children get locked into the expectations of their genders too early?

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AleciaLudwickJones AleciaLudwickJones 6 years
I am reading a lot of comments about what's going to happen when the kid is a teenager. The kid is going to figure out it's biological gender soon enough. They aren't keeping the kids gender from she/him just society. You're having a girl you get 'girly' things, a boy you get 'boy' things-they seem to feel that saying pink for girls and blue for boys is too limiting so they're going to a drastic measure to avoid that. It doesn't really affect anyone besides the child whether it's a boy or girl and the child WILL know. It's kinda 'strange' but really who cares how they want to raise their kid, there are much worse things happening to children that should be a bigger concern.
JuliaBarbarick JuliaBarbarick 6 years
I hate to be the bearer of bad news....but Oprah is over. The parents of this child waited to long to experiment on them!
PamelaNaddy PamelaNaddy 6 years
Hmmm. One of the strangest things I've heard. My first thought is, REALLY?
CarolChinchilla CarolChinchilla 6 years
This is interesting, but the sexual identity takes long time to shape and I just wonder if what they are doing is worth it...what does it matter if is boy or girl, it is just part of this identity and the child will learn it every day...soon he or she will ask questions and will see that he/she is similar to dad or mom anyway.
MichelleFish54396 MichelleFish54396 6 years
What happened to being happy with yourself and enjoying the sex they are given.
CoMMember13630981193824 CoMMember13630981193824 6 years
Whats wrong with these ppl?! U have a boy r a girl! Not an 'IT'! If he doesnt no that hes a boy r a girl then when he/she grows up he'll probably b a cross dresser!! How stupid!!
DawnaKaiser DawnaKaiser 6 years
actually, there isn't always either a penis or a vagina. sometimes the physical sex of the child is difficult to define. our society has no place for those kids. all forms ask "male or female". if more people thought like this couple, maybe we would be more open to ignoring the whole "male or female" thing altogether. or at least add a few other options. gender and gender roles are social, not physical, attributes. a penis/vagina does not always mean that the child's gender is male/female, and vice versa. why does everyone want to know if someone is male/female (especially a baby)? because they want to know which set of gender rules to try to force that person into. i doubt this work work for very long for these parents, but kudos to them for trying to buck the label system.
LurendaStenger LurendaStenger 6 years
WTH your either boy or girl the thing between your legs determines that . COME ON !!!!!
PeggyCrawford25535 PeggyCrawford25535 6 years
WOW! what some people will do for attention these days!
JillAveryStoss JillAveryStoss 6 years
Gender is not an either/or sort of thing. It exists on a spectrum. Genitalia does not equal masculinity or feminity. The shamefully close-minded comments here are perfect examples of the panic that ensues when we are able to force clear cut labels onto someone. This child will be fine- it's the rest of society that isn't.
ShanxonLemasters ShanxonLemasters 6 years
While I think this family may be on the extreme side of things, I admire it. My children chose their own hairstyles if they want it cut if not son was very open to everything and enjoyed "girl" stuff until his father and I split up and his father implemented girl things and boy things....and then my son went to school and now is even afraid to tell people he likes the color pink. I am very saddened by this as I want my children to be allowed to like whatever it is that they like regardless of its gender specific idealism. I have 3 boys and 1 girl and I know my girl is going to be a "tom-boy" she already is, BUT she does have girl things as well and loves purses and babies but it's no different than my son when he was her age he loved purses and stuffed animals as well why can't they just be happy children and not be labeled by their gender? Yes everyone is USUALLY either a male or a female but why make that define who you really are? The children know what their genders are it's just the outside world that doesn't, why does everyone feel the need to know? How many babies that are dressed neutral do you not really know the gender of unless you ask? Why ask? My step son had the curliest long hair until he was about 3 everyone always thought he was a girl it didn't matter how he was dressed and I never felt the need to correct them, they were complimenting my child as being gorgeous and beautiful that's all that mattered.
courtneyforino courtneyforino 6 years
are people trying to make the lives of thier kids worse. I thought parents wanted to make thier childs life better. All this is going to do is create a lot of confusion and probably resentment. im in awe of this i dont really know what else to say but man i hope the parents wake up.
robinhenry robinhenry 6 years
wow that's really stupid. they aren't "letting their kids be whoever they want to be" you can't help but encourage them to cross dress if you don't tell them what's normal. they are pushing those boys to be girls. kids have a tendency to think they're weird when they're normal. what are those poor boys going to think about themselves when they get older? what if they wanted to be normal boys? people need to feel connected, gender helps us.
MeghanLyons MeghanLyons 6 years
Wow! From the home pool birth to sleeping on the floor(they had sex to make more children with their other children in bed to!!!!) It's all a bit odd. Those poor kids are gonna be so confused and picked on.
DonnaGray35597 DonnaGray35597 6 years
okay...really people. The child will become curios early on about what this "thing" is between his/her legs....At what age do u tell your child that you are a girl/boy? When do u cut his/her hair? What about clothing?? Will they only dress him/her in jeans/sweats and t-shirts until they have been told what gender they are? So when they go off to preschool....and the teacher asks the children..."raise your hand if you are a boy/girl". this child will not raise his/her hand...they will not know.....TOO DAMN CONFUSING!!!
CoMMember13631165689809 CoMMember13631165689809 6 years
I agree a counseler or child services! Mattresses together on the floor? This whole article was very disturbing to ME! and I am not the kind to judge gender! I am ok with young adults and adults being however they wish sexually, im all for being different, and the outgoing different kind but this, this is something unheard of! Its like these kinds of adults are doing this to there kids to make up for something they missed, something they longed for growing up! Really these are children, babies! They need some sort of direction, and that direction comes from the MOM AND DAD! I am wondering if these so called "parents" will give these kids "the talk" when there older???????
SaraRopp SaraRopp 6 years
All right, this is SOOO wrong. First of all there is no such thing as genderless. You are what you are and if you decide that you want to be something different you are messing up Gods handiwork. If you made something beautiful in your image and gave it life, and somewhere down the road your creation decided that you had been very stupid in your choice of "parts" and changed it how would you feel? That is the same with what these gender free people are doing. Yes, I do believe in God and that he made us all just the way he wants us. Second of all the kids social services should be involved at this point. Not to send your child to school because you think a 4 or 5 year old can make a decision like that , which will affect his whole life? Somebody like this should not have kids. I dread to think how these poor kids will growe up. They will be so messed up.
KimbelryEubanks KimbelryEubanks 6 years
Oh brother! Why does COM even POST stuff like this? It is ridiculous! Seriously!?
audreyferrand audreyferrand 6 years
I agree 100% on what everyone is saying I hope thos parents read these comments!!!
KimberlyLimoges KimberlyLimoges 6 years
I find this a very odd parental approach, unless you have both genitalia, you are either a boy or girl and i dont believe that neither is something to hide . You can totally allow your child to be their own being whithout hiding who they are, if a girl wants to play with gi joes, or a boy wants to play with dolls, its what they wanna do, it doesnt mean anything else.
HeatherBlau HeatherBlau 6 years
WTF??!! Are they serious? what is the world coming to? These parents should not have been aloud to breed!
EmilyGrantKretler EmilyGrantKretler 6 years
This is insane...either you have a penis or you don't...its black and white....stop making up gray areas where they don't belong....and I fully agree with the comment about some counselors are going to make a lot of money someday
CoMMember13625562109747 CoMMember13625562109747 6 years
This wont last past K5 when the teachers need to know which restroom to send them to and as soon as the child knows if it uses the door with the girl in a dress or not, so will the other kids...."Oh, ok cool you're a b/g...good to know."
LindaPeruchet LindaPeruchet 6 years
normally i would agree with everyone coming against these parents grandbaby was born a girl but her chromosomes say she is a boy....she has no ovaries...but may be confused when she gets it makes me rethink what they are doing and maybe understand just a little...and I mean just a little!!
HaleyEvans HaleyEvans 6 years
I think what these parents are doing is amazing and wonderful. Although, I do feel like everyone's gender is a part of them and one that shouldn't be completely ignored. Obviously, as seen with the other 2 children one can explore and become who they truly are AND know that they are girls or (on this case) boys. Gender is almost completely societal, not inherent. Gender is learned whether you're talking about behavior, color or toy preferences or anything else. One learns what is expected of someone of their gender and they're expected, often times forced, to conform to those expectations and that is absolutely not right. We should love our children unconditionally for who they truly are and choose to be whether that fits into the cultural norm or not, but many of us, although we truly think we do accept our children for who they truly are, we' the parents are the ones who have chosen who that is or is supposed to be. These parents may be taking it to a slight extreme, but liberating their children from society's closeminded "box" is a beautiful thing, even they can only completely break from that box while at home. They are raising children who will know beyond the shadow of a doubt who exactly they are and they will not be afraid to continue to be that person even in the face of opposition. That's SO much than I could say even now, in my journey of self-acceptance and self-examination. I still find myself conforming to what others think I should be sometimes and many times I still feel like I wish I knew who I truly was in a completely unaltered sense. Anyways... I love what these parents are doing. And remember... whatever decisions you make in regards to your children no matter how great your conviction to do so, other parents have made their decisions based on the same strength of conviction even though they may not be the same decision as yours.
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