I love having my rambunctious 2-year-old to chase around, and despite my previous insistence that we were one-and-done, I've come to see the idea of having another child as more and more intriguing, albeit terrifying and confusing.
Transitioning from a nonparent to a parent was hard enough that I'm in awe of everyone I see with more than one kid. Between financial concerns, time, and energy, I have a very serious list of questions for parents with more than one kid.
1. First of all, are you secretly superheroes?
No, really, inquiring minds want to know. At the end of my day wrangling my energetic 2-year-old, writing, and trying to take care of all the chores, I'm spent. I've developed a little theory that parents of more than one kid are secretly superheroes who can freeze time. Otherwise, how could you explain taking care of everything that needs to get done?
2. Where do you put all the things that come with more than one kid?
I feel like my house is already filled to the brim with toddler stuff. Yet when I go to some of my friends' houses who have more than one kid, I'm astonished to find that their places still look put-together and cool. Since elves aren't real, I'm assuming that there is a life hack that I'm not aware of that effortlessly hides all the things.
3. When do you find time to exercise?
Despite having more time than many, I still can't seem to get back to my running goal of 25 miles a week. I'm lucky if I get three or four runs in at best, because when you're pushing a 50-pound stroller, it's hard to build up mileage. Whenever I am out for a run, invariably I come across a woman who is pushing a double-wide jogging stroller, sweating up a storm, and going faster than me. I see you, amazing moms who exercise, and I am astounded by you.
4. Does your relationship with your partner change?
As my husband and I seem to have this never-ending conversation about whether or not we should have another one, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that one scary aspect of having another kid is the relationship side of things. I love the way we are now, and having another might change that.
5. Is the new-baby smell still really that good?
There's nothing quite as intoxicating as getting a full whiff of new-baby smell. That sweet baby freshness was so good the first time. I wonder if it's just as strong when you're also having to chase after a toddler?
6. Do you do special arm exercises to lift them both?
My son is a giant toddler, and even though he's getting heavy, I still want to hold him as much as he'll let me. With another baby, would I need to lift weights beforehand to manage them both? Because something tells me he would want extra cuddles.
7. Is it easier or harder the second time around?
Having a baby is a challenge, but it's definitely gotten easier as he's gotten older. When having a second kid, or a third or fourth, does it get easier each time? I'm sure this is a question that has parents of more than one kid laughing out loud.
8. Does love grow or change?
I know that a person can never reach a point where they've run out of love, since it's not a finite thing. It's just that I sometimes look at my son and think that my heart couldn't possibly love anything as much as I love him in that moment. How is it possible that hearts are so capable of so much love?