We all know the story of Joseph, Mary, and the birth of baby Jesus, but we are pretty certain a few details got left out of the Bible. Namely, that the Virgin Mary, like all of us new moms, was downright exhausted after, you know, giving birth in a barn.
In this weekend's Saturday Night Live, Emma Stone starred as Mary in a hilarious "retelling" of the events immediately following her unmedicated labor . . . without the help of a doctor or a midwife.
"Well, I don't know about you, Joseph, but I'm not in the mood to have people over right now," says Mary, speaking for all postpartum women throughout time. Still, her husband lets every visitor come right in to promptly tell Mary how she "looks tired." Even the three wise men, who come bearing gold, frankincense, and myrrh, couldn't think to come with anything useful, like a crib or diapers?! Come on!
"Sorry," Mary said. "I guess when I found out I was going to give birth to the savior, I just assumed it was going to be nicer. That there would be a real bed, and I don't know, like a doctor and no sheep poop on the floor. But everybody's looking at me and I feel puffy and I feel gross."
How's that for a historically accurate nativity scene?