POPSUGAR

It's Not Your Imagination — Your MIL Hates You Since You Gave Birth to Her Grandchild

Jun 20 2018 - 3:45pm

You had her favorite and only grandchild and so your mother-in-law [1] couldn't be any more excited! Technically, you should be her favorite person, and for a while there, you were. She called and texted you constantly and couldn't wait to hear more about how the baby was doing. She even asked how you felt after labor (or a C-section) and brought you a little postbirth present. You two were sort of like BFFs. Well, as close as you can be with someone who's not your own mom and as close as she can be with someone who, well, took her son away. Sniff.

But now? Oh, it's a whole different ball game. Before you could do no wrong, as the bearer of the greatest of all: the grandbaby. But now? Now you are doing everything wrong, according to your dear old mother-in-law. Here are three signs your MIL kind of hates you after having her grandchild.

First She Says: "Don't Do That!"

She questions your every parenting move, from the type of diapers you use to your nursing or feeding process/schedule or what have you. She reminds you of what she did as a young mother, in a way to validate her own parenting, but also to tell you that "Hey lady: you are doing it all wrong!"

Watch This!

I Kid You Not

These Paws-itively Adorable Kids and Pets Will Have You Melting

You've started telling her less, simply out of fear that you will get her angry or worse, get yourself entangled in a fight.

Then: She Gets In Her Son's Ear

Even if your hubby ignores her, she starts to bother him about what it is that she believes you're doing wrong. This way, she believes, she will have her son on her side and can get you to stop whatever supposedly offensive behavior you're doing. It's not that she hates you exactly, but more that as she sees you with the new baby, a part of her longs for those days back herself. A part of her is envious. Another part of her believes that she truly knows what is best for her grandchild and doesn't want to give up on her opinions.

Mostly, her son is tired of being in the middle and probably is on your side.

The best approach? Simply validate her feelings by saying, "I appreciate how much you care for the baby and that you may have done things differently than I am, but things always change with time and I am doing my best."

In other words? Don't engage the beast!

Lastly: She Admonishes You Publicly

She doesn't hold back from sharing her feelings about you and your parenting in public because most likely, you're following your own maternal instincts and not hers so therefore, she has "had enough." Whether it's at a family gathering or you have invited her to lunch or the park, you'll know she really dislikes you by how she picks you apart, whether it's for the dress you decided to wear, how you dressed your baby, how you breathe, where you bought your groceries, or where you plan on having your child's first birthday party.

Basically, you're doomed. How do you manage this situation?

You can't change her, but you can manage how you respond to her.

It's not always easy getting along with your MIL but hopefully, this little angry stage will pass in time. In the meantime, take the high road and turn the other cheek!


Source URL
https://www.popsugar.com/family/Signs-Your-Mother--Law-Hates-You-40518118