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Tips For Talking to Your Young Kids About Sex

Carrie Bradshaw didn't do me any favors. Thanks to the title of her famous movie, my daughter broached the subject of sex. As parents we know the time will come, I just didn't think it it would be so soon — at four and a half! From watching movie trailers and catching bits of playground gossip, she deduced that sex is sleeping with someone naked and kissing on the lips. In the course of of our impromptu and G-rated conversation, I realized that keeping the chat as low key and comfortable as possible opens the lines of communication.

  • Don't freak out. Your reaction sets the tone for future conversations.
  • Ask your tot what they know and where they got their information. Then go from there. There's no need to break out charts and graphs for a three-year-old.
  • Tell them an age-appropriate version of the truth.
  • Don't scare your kids by getting overly serious. RELAX!
  • Encourage them to come to you in the future as they have further questions and/or thoughts.

Photo courtesy of New Line Cinema

Join The Conversation
jessie jessie 8 years
hithatsmybike....after stuttering for about 5 minutes...i was able to explain to the kids..ages 5,7,& simple enough terms what happens and why....after telling them they pretty much looked at me and then continued on their merry way. i needed a shot of whisky! LOL...not really.....but i really wasn't prepared for that kind of question! but i thought i did well for spur of the moment
hithatsmybike hithatsmybike 8 years
Jessie, you explained abortion?? How did that go?
hithatsmybike hithatsmybike 8 years
my parents always had a very relaxed attitude towards sex, and I plan to maintain the same approach when I have children of my own. I am surprised a 4yro figured it out though! Wow! I'm also supportive of parents that provide their children with birth control. I plan to do the same. I'm not going to get in their face about it, and I don't want to know any details of who or when, but maybe I'll just keep condoms or the pill in the bathroom closet so it's always available, as needed. I would much much much rather have a healthy sexually active teenager than a pregnant one, or one with an STD. and as for the prop 8 thing.. definitely going to have princesses marrying princesses allowed in my house! =)
kikidawn kikidawn 8 years
"That is so stupid!" That's a good way to put it. My mom talked to me about sex, but it was a religious "don't have sex until marriage" thing (not that there is anything wrong with that), but when I started having sex I wasn't able to go to her and tell her that I wanted on birth control. I thought that they would make me stop seeing my boyfriend and have a very dramatic reaction to my decision to have sex. So when I have kids I'm going to try very hard to make sure my kids can come to me for *anything* even going on birth control if that is what they want.
momma-tikita momma-tikita 8 years
talk about.. ::gulp:: my kids... :faint:
Moms Moms 8 years
Macgirl — prop 8 was a hot topic in our house too. My daughter doesn't understand why one of her aunts can get married and another cannot. Her response was — "That is so stupid!"
macgirl macgirl 8 years
4 and a 1/2! I was struggling when the 9 year old wanted to know how I got pregnant. Other fun conversations this year- why is there a pregnant man? Which brought up transgenders and homosexuality. Neither I have an issue with, just didn't know how to go about explaining it. Luckily this made him an expert on California's proposition 8- why would anyone not let two men get married if they really wanted to?
jessie jessie 8 years
:faint:...i've already had to explain abortion this past week...i know sex isn't far behind.....the tips above help....anymore would be greatly appreciated! :)
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