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Too Sexy, Too Soon

Too Sexy, Too Soon

For many moms of tween and teen daughters, a shopping trek to the local mall can turn into a jaw-dropping experience. From $14,000 diamond-covered prom dresses, to low-cut, skimpy sheaths that are anything but elegant, there’s plenty to get up in arms about.

As a mom of two daughters (and a son), I yearn for the days when I was the family’s Chief Fashion Officer. As CFO, my mission was cute and sweet, not Snooki and sexualized.

I used to love buying cute little coordinating Easter and holiday outfits for my trio. But once the tween years hit, my CFO role was pink-slipped, literally, as my daughters begged for Victoria’s Secret PINK sweet cheeks panty collections and sweat pants with “Hard to Get” on the butt.


It’s hard to whip out your credit card (or take out a bank loan) to fund fashions from the jungle of animal-patterned, lace and leather getups that are pushed on tweens and teens. A friend of mine describes the look as “hooker on parade.” Not exactly what you envision for your 12 year-old daughter.

I don’t consider myself a prude. But as a mom, I strive so hard to teach my children to respect themselves so that others will respect them too. I believe that what we wear and how we care for ourselves send a strong signal about who we are and what we value.

I know that materialism is huge with tweens and teens. For teens, brands define their status among peers. So I am okay with occasionally shelling out the funds for stuff “everybody has.” But honestly, the risque getups in Madonna's daughter's Material Girl Collection are not exactly what I want my daughters to aspire to.

Turns out I am not alone.

One Circle of Moms member, Jessie R. finds the issue of teens dressing in an overly-sexualized way so stressful that she's glad she has a son: "Every time I see young girls dressed like hookers I praise god that I have a son. It wasn't until I had him that I realized I got off easy! "

How do you get your tween or teen daughter to dress appropriately?

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Join The Conversation
DrewT1385385730 DrewT1385385730 3 years
I'm 13 and I wear mainly print t-shirts and denim shorts. I was never encouraged to shop at brand places when I was younger and I buy most of my clothes online. Actually, my mom would give me a budget (like $70 for summer clothing) and if I needed more I could reason with her.
StephanieWebb8067 StephanieWebb8067 6 years
i actually sad i have two boys because of this. im scared its going to be harder then a prayer away to show them both that women(young or old) are not to be oogled . tho along side that i pray that i can show and encourage my daughter to be modest as well as self controlled.
ElizabethDaley ElizabethDaley 6 years
My daughter is 2 years old and I can't help but worry about what will be the "trend" when she is a teen. However, I do have 2 nieces and they sometimes like to try to follow the crowd, but my brother has set his rules and all of the family respects and backs him up on those rules. We all try to teach them that you can still be cool and fashionable but dress in a way that respectful to yourself and others. I want my daughter to be confident enough in herself to know that she doesn't need to put it all out there in order to be liked.
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