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Tot Talk: The Hilarious Things Kids Say

Most mothers think their children are crack-ups, but some things that come out of the mouths of babes are funny or offbeat enough to entertain the masses. I've compiled a few of my favorites from friends and my own offspring in the last month.

  • "I am getting my baby in five years!" — Three-year-old boy to his grandma after his parents told him he was going to be a big brother.
  • "You are such a big boy. I love you!" — Two-year-old boy to mother after she handed him an ice cream cone.
  • "Daddy has a tail. The baby has a tail too!" — Two-year-old girl to her mom after seeing her dad get out of the shower and her brother's diaper being changed.
  • "Cole and I met at the gumball machine and hung out everyday then poof! he was gone." — Four-year-old girl telling her mother about "boyfriend." The mom asked if she was sad and the little girl replied, "No, I'm going to move on because that is what women do!"
  • "I didn't do that my imaginary friend Andrew did. Actually, I don't have an imaginary friend, but I don't want to pick up the wrapper and I'm running out of names." — Five-year-old girl responding to mom's question about who threw their wrapper on the floor.
  • "Hi, mom! How are ya doing today?" — Two-year-old boy's question to mother after they came home from spending six hours at the park and running errands together.

Has your youngster said anything humorous lately?


Join The Conversation
sarahm73 sarahm73 8 years
After hearing me call my newborn "little bird ' my 5 year old said "She's like one of those woodpeckers except she's a boobpecker!"
Advah Advah 8 years
All these and what people posted are hilarious!! :D I guess that shows kids *do* hear and remember what they hear around them!
kikidawn kikidawn 8 years
:rotfl: @ "Daddy has a tail and baby has a tail"
smileyface smileyface 8 years
My cousin just had a baby, and now my other cousin, who will be 5 in a couple of days is no longer the baby of the family. In response to how she feels about this she replied that the new baby will now have to be everyone's baby because she can't stay a baby anymore and she has to grow up.
bluepuppybites bluepuppybites 8 years
When I first told our 2 1/2 year old that mommy has a baby in her tummy she said "Mommy has a puppy in her tummy!" My parents had just gotten a new puppy and I think that has something to do with it.
lickety-split lickety-split 8 years
a few weeks ago the flags here were at half staff. we drove by a fire station and my 10 year old asked "why are the flags at half staff?" my 8 year old responded "it's the economy. if obama doesn't watch out that things gonna hit the ground".
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