Skip Nav
Audi Super Bowl Father and Daughter Racing Commercial 2017
Daughters
Audi's Ad With a Dad Contemplating His Daughter's Worth Will Give You Chills
Food and Activities
24 Freezable Dishes to Bring New Moms
Photography
This Dad's Reaction to His Rainbow Baby Being Born Is Beyond Moving

When Toddlers Won't Nap

The Day My Toddler Wouldn't Nap Anymore

It's one o'clock in the afternoon — do you know where your toddler is? All his friends are fast asleep, napping soundly after lunch. But your little one is climbing the walls, wanting to play, asking for snacks, and begging to go to the park, perhaps all at once. Sound familiar? If so, what should you do? Should you force the issue, or give in? How long should you try for a good nap routine before you throw in the towel?

Jennifer raises this very question in one of our communities. Her 3-year-old simply will not go down without a fight. My son, also 3, is very much of the little-to-no napping camp. And what I realized one afternoon after I once again resorted to bribery — and, once again, failed! — is that it was a losing battle, that for the sake of everyone's sanity I should simply stop asking Olin to nap on my schedule. 

You see, Olin has resisted sleep since the day he was born. Sure, every newborn sleeps in fits and starts, but my son has always fought sleep, even before he had ideas about what else he might be doing. And when he does finally succumb, you can trust it won't be for long. Even now, he goes to sleep in his own cozy bed, but he invariably wakes up at the crack of dawn, wanting company. 

ADVERTISEMENT

My epiphany that it was OK that he isn't a napper happened as follows. We were lying in his big futon on the floor one afternoon, and I was trying to think of a bribe that might work. Would he like to watch Caillou after his nap? Get pizza for dinner? Take his balance bike up to the enclosed area at the nearby schoolyard? But even though he loves all those things, he knew he couldn't say yes to a nap. Instead, he said to me, "Mama, I'm really not tired. Could I have some quiet time reading with you instead?" It was then that it dawned on me he was not trying to wrangle out of something he honestly needed to do. He just wasn't tired, and he didn't need a nap. Period. 

In fact, on rare occasions when he does need to nap, he will let me know, and while the timing isn't always convenient, this demonstrates that he isn't just being contrary. Toddlers, and kids of all ages, need different amounts of sleep per day — and at different times of their lives.

His sincere request disarmed me and helped me realize that rest might be what we both needed more than anything. More, even, than sleep. 

And so we read his favorite firefighter books, talked about what we wanted to do this weekend, and caught up in a way that wouldn't have been possible if I'd been spending all my energy getting him to sleep. It's true — I didn't get the dishes done or read a book of my own, but I had the much more delightful experience of hanging out with my son, quietly.

Image Source: Shutterstock
From Our Partners
Should Kids Use Loofas in the Bath?
Morning Routine of Working Mom With a Toddler
Jenna Dewan's Quotes on Having a Toddler
EWG Safest Sunscreens For Kids and Babies 2018
How to Boost Your Immune System
How to React When Your Kids Insult You
The Reason Your Child Can't Sleep
Toddler Throws Tantrum at Chick-fil-A
What Is Elimination Communication?
Relaxing Sleep Playlist
Sleeping Tips For Newborns
What It's Like to Wake Up Early
From Our Partners
Latest Moms
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds