The pregnancy books tell you that your breasts will get engorged (HUGE) right after you give birth as your milk is coming in. It makes a flat chest look like heaven. While it's fun to look like Pamela Anderson for a second or two, what comes after is so not sexy.

When I got home from the hospital with our new bundle of love, I couldn't wait to get in my own shower, put on my new fluffy robe and enjoy my first week of motherhood. I had been cautious not to take hot showers when I was pregnant because I was convinced it would hurt the baby.

So, I jumped in the scalding hot shower and to my surprise, milk sprayed. It was like Water Works for babies. Oh, how I wished I had bottles to capture the liquid gold that escaped. I felt a little weirded out by my body, but at least I was clean. Only when I made it down the hall, did I realize I was drenched in milk, again!

I quickly learned that warm water and physical contact with the nipple stimulates the "let down" reflex. For the next 8 months, I lived with nursing pads in my bra and wore one to bed until I finally weaned my baby.

Why didn't anybody tell me that I was going to spray milk, wear nursing pads non-stop, and become a prisoner to a bra? At least I'll know what to expect next time!