Getting Kids Ready For School Is a Total Sh*tshow, and I Would Like Your Support

Updated on 5/25/2018 at 6:20 PM

Ah, morning routines. Before kids, they were filled with snooze buttons, long sips of hot coffee, and watching the news while eating a breakfast that you actually wanted to eat. After kids, mornings are filled with crack-of-dawn wake-up calls, short sips of cold coffee, bites of your kids' leftover food, and begging them to get out of bed (and then chasing them around to get ready). Even if your kids love school, making them look like presentable humans for the day is no easy task. You basically feel like you've fought (and usually lost) a major battle . . . and it isn't even 9 a.m. Keep reading for 10 stages moms can relate to while getting little ones ready for school.

You're out of bed, feeling good, and ready to get your kid (or kids) off to school.

You turn the light on in your kid's room and they act as though you've brought the actual sun into your home.

Conveniently, though, they quickly perk up to demand food.

You make them food, but instead of sitting down to eat it, they're running around NOT getting ready.

And when they do eventually sit down, the healthy meal you made ends up mostly on their face or on the floor.

After numerous "We're gonna be late!" threats, your child decides to get ready . . . at a snail's pace.

Because why get dressed when dancing in your underwear is more fun?

You take a deep breath and count down from five to try and not lose your cool.

But after your kid spends 15 minutes trying to convince you they can wear their dirty socks, you realize it's over.

So you end up physically carrying your child — a tired, half-fed, dirty-sock-wearing weirdo — to the bus.

And then . . . COFFEE.