I met this guy that i've been dating for 7 months. He has morals. He's Ambitious. He's a Gentleman. With that being said. Sex was not always great. Although he remained "firmed". He hardly had an orgasm. I first thought it had to do with me. But then I discovered that not only did he have 250 porn CDs, but he pleasures himself at least once a week. We talked about how that affected our sexual relationship. If he's using that opportunity to have an orgasm, it was not fair to me. He promised to stop. However, I've found CDs in his payer, when he don't expect me over. Five months after dating, I realized, that his roommate, and his roommate girlfriend, who he often spoke of, daily, with ups and downs everyday woes, never existed. All this time it was his wife. Still married, but separated and sleeping in different bedroom. When I found out, it was a month and a half of him moving to his current appt. It wasn't because someone had told me, or I had uncovered information. He had always presented her as his ex, who he hardly spoke with. However, after he had mentioned something the "ex" resently had told him, the next morning it popped in my head that she was the roommate. He was shock when I asked him, but he admitted the truth. Because I don't sleep with someone right away I did not rush to go to his house. The few times I did go, she wasn't there. It also didn't cross my mind. Then the "roommate", went out town, a little after we became sexually active. Nothing at the house brought questions to my mind. I related everthing to the "romates's girlfriend.
Last but not least, there is the issue of his 21 Son's mother. She is someone that he would visit on Saturdays, spend the night, and come home on Sunday. However, because I questioned it he stop going. He was not too happy about it. He said he went there to see his son. However, I told him I dont have an issue with him visiting his son, but there was no need for him to sleep there, because he lives only 1hr away. He took me there twice to meet her, because he said that she is the only family he had, and he wanted to show me that there is nothing going on between them. As for the reason why he lied about the wife..... Yes they are married, but since the time they separated, 4 years ago, he moved back 2 years ago, and they decided to have him rent a room, to her help her financially. They both are doing their own thing in the dating world. And.....they are now in the process of divorce. But the process hasnt started because she said she was going to handle it, but now she is expecting him to do it. And... He thought that if he told me the truth, I wouldn't have dated him to begin with.
As for other lies, twice he went to spend the day with his son/son mother. Once he openly lied, and the other time he choose to not mention he was going. It so happened that I called while they were out having dinner.
Now, it's been 4 Weeks since the truth has come to surface, and I've decided to give a him a chance to show me that beside his lies, he's a good man, and it was all a big mistake on his part, and he regrets every second. Since then, we've argued more often, and my trust is very limited. Yes, he said sorry. Yes, I've told him I wanted to end things and gave back his keys, he begged me not to leave him, and he of course gave me back the keys. Most of the time I do not feel he's really going out his way to win me back. Also he's been very distant. All of a sudden he's tired and is supposing home just relaxing. When I talked to him about it, he acts if I'm crazy. He talks about us getting married, or at least planning marriage next year. I'm just still asking myself if I'm waisting my time and if he's worth bringing into the new year, and if he is someone I want around my girls?
Thank you for your opinion, and please excuse my Gammer. English is not my first language