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Tech and Dating Tips

Tech Dating 101: Is it Appropriate to Make Big Life Announcements Online?

As I mentioned last week, we're teaming up with DearSugar to bring you a series about love and the technologies that connect us called Tech Dating 101 ('cause we all have our fair share of questions in this department!). So now that we've covered the ins and outs of changing your relationship status on social networking sites like Facebook, it's time to tackle a topic that always raises lots of questions — online announcements like births, breakups, and weddings. And now for our second question of the series:

Is it appropriate to make big life announcements online?:

Yes and no, depending on what the announcement is. First of all, think of the amount of people in your life who aren't as tech savvy as you — whether that be your mother, grandfather, or great aunt Edna — and put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel if a friend of a cousin told you that your grandson was just born and that they saw the news via a Twitter update or on their Facebook news feed? You catch my drift. For major announcements, contact your closest family members and friends the old fashioned way — by phone. And if you really want, shoot out an email (so it isn't as impersonal as blasting out on a social networking site), and be sure to call those who aren't as wired as you.

To find out about online breakup announcements just


Now in terms of breakups, definitely go ahead and change your relationship status on your Facebook profile page, but delete the status update change in your news feed so that it doesn't take on a life of its own (and turn into a long gossipy chatting affair). If you are really hurt and upset about the breakup, try to refrain from using the Internet as a place to vent or say negative things about your ex. You don't want to say anything you'll regret later (like trash talking your ex) since virtual content can come back to haunt you later. And if you want your closest friends to be there for you, call or text them before you let the world know on Facebook. This way, they'll be more sensitive to your feelings, and less inclined to say the "I'm so sorry" in front of all of your Twitter followers.

To see what DearSugar had to say about this topic, you can check out her answer here.


jelibeann jelibeann 8 years
I don't's easy and fun to go and post your new engagement, marriage, etc, which I see all the time, now that ALL of my friends are moving in that direction at the same's exciting and you want everyone to know...but those things can end and then you have to deal with the repercussions of changing those generally happy notes to generally sad ones...and then it's awkward...I learned about my husband's friend's divorce before he did and my friend's uncle's break-up via his now-ex bizarre!
Angelica Angelica 8 years
I couldn't agree with you more, geeksugar! I think it's perfectly understandable that some people will alert friends of major news via email, or facebook or a blog, but you just need to make sure you don't say anything you'll regret later and you need to make sure your "first circle" of very close friends know before you go posting and major news for the whole www to see. It's fair to assume you are going to hate on your ex a bit in the mass email you send to friends alerting them of your breakup, but write it, wait a few days, see how you feel and then send it. A little time never hurt anyone!
midori0e midori0e 8 years
In terms of Facebook, I left status unfilled. If I have to fill status, I will fill complicated if I could. Isn't life complex anyway? Its better to explain your relationship then using the following: single, married, attached, divorced, widowed etc...btw, I would not announce anything too important via social network unless I can do it prior via phone, email and person and it depends on where the person is.
livline livline 8 years
I'm currently going through a divorce and I signed up with facebook over two years ago... SO there's no way to hide my last name change back to my maiden name! Oh well! I wonder how many of my friends are going to write some BS on my WALL about that. Some people have no clue about spazzing out on someone else's wall. Eegads.
skigurl skigurl 8 years
i changed my privacy settings on facebook a long time ago to ensure that when i changed certain aspects of my profile (ie: relationship or when i left a group - this was way back in the good old facebook days, none of this stupid new format) that it wouldn't be posted all over the place
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