Ellen's Best One-Liners From the Oscars

Updated on 3/3/2014 at 8:30 AM

Ellen DeGeneres hosted the Oscars for the second time, and she's only getting better with practice. The host inspired a ton of laughter during her opening monologue, and she really hit a good balance between being funny without totally skewering the stars. In case you missed her best moments, here are her funniest and flat-out best quotes of the evening!

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"I'm telling everyone that you were wonderful in Nebraska. Wonderful." — To 84-year-old June Squibb

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"Meryl cannot afford to be nominated again." — On how expensive it is to be nominated

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"If you win tonight, I think we should bring you the Oscar." — On Jennifer Lawrence's balance issues

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"One of the best Liza impersonators I've ever seen in my life. Good job, sir." — To Liza Minnelli

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"It has been raining. We're fine, thank you for your prayers." — On LA's weather situation

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"I'm not going to say who looks the most beautiful, but it's Jared Leto." — On the good-looking crowd

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"It deals with the serious issue of people having sex at the rodeo . . . speaking of, Bruce Dern is here tonight." — On Dallas Buyers Club

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"No, I don't want to see it." — To Jonah Hill

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"That is so . . . what is the word for it . . . selfish." — On Amy Adams being in two nominated movies

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"Possibility #2, you're all racists. And now, please welcome our first white presenter, Anne Hathaway." — On the idea of 12 Years a Slave not winning best picture

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Ellen's Best One-Liners From the Oscars

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