17 Imaginary Emmys For Your Favorite Shows

Updated on 7/18/2014 at 11:00 AM

After Emmy nominations were announced last week, there was an outcry about shows and stars that got snubbed. Though we agree that Orphan Black deserved some recognition, instead of crying about it, we have a better idea. In addition to all the fantastic shows that got nominated this year, we'd like to extend 17 imaginary Emmys for things like Olivia Pope's signature lip quiver, the amazing butts on Game of Thrones, and True Blood's full frontal. Keep reading for all of our dream categories — and the winners, because we won't make you wait until Aug. 25 to find out who came out on top. Source: BBC America

AMC

Best Performance by a Nipple: Ben Feldman, Mad Men

Even better if you imagine Ginsberg singing, "It's my nip in a box!"

NBC

Best Unexpected Save: Community

Cool. Cool, cool, cool, Yahoo.

ABC

Best Lip Quiver in a Drama: Kerry Washington, Scandal

With both Fitz and Jake.

HBO

Best Visual ASSets: Game of Thrones

Daario delivers the truth . . . and nothing but(t) the truth.

HBO

Best Use of Tied-Together Sticks: True Detective

Bonus: they get increasingly larger throughout the season.

NBC

Best Yelling at Jon Hamm in a Time Jump: Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation

Yes, he's even worse than Jerry.

Best Dance Scene With Four Clones: Tatiana Maslany, Orphan Black

Actually, she should get four separate Emmys. Source: BBC America

ABC

Best Dance Party as an Exit: Sandra Oh and Ellen Pompeo, Grey's Anatomy

FYI, there has now been a full decade of dancing on this show.

NBC

Best Sex While Crying in a Hospital Bed: Mae Whitman and Matt Lauria, Parenthood

For impressive maneuvering around multiple casts.

Best Return From the Dead: Sherlock

We finally got an answer to how Sherlock (Benedict Cumberbatch) pulled off that cliffhanger. Or at least we think that we did. Now all we need to know is what is going on with Moriarty (Andrew Scott). Source: BBC America

CBS

Best Divisive Finale: How I Met Your Mother

#themotherisdead.

HBO

Best Full Frontal in the Snow: Alexander Skarsgard, True Blood

Eric (Skarsgard) is so hot that he catches on fire immediately after.

Best Creepy Threesome: House of Cards

We have just one question: why? Source: Netflix

Best Metaphoric Explosion Followed by a Literal Explosion: Pretty Little Liars

Though perhaps less explosive than the Gossip Girl reveal. Source: ABC Family

Best Unexpected Penis-Size Reference: Orange Is the New Black

So Joe Caputo (Nick Sandow) has a "beer can"-sized member? Noted. Source: Netflix

Best Lumberjack Ending: Dexter

Surprisingly less bloody than the Six Feet Under series finale.

Fox

Best Earnest Effort in Making Americans Look Dumb: I Wanna Marry "Harry"

In this game, does anyone really win?

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17 Imaginary Emmys For Your Favorite Shows

Best Performance by a Nipple: Ben Feldman, Mad Men

Best Unexpected Save: Community

Best Lip Quiver in a Drama: Kerry Washington, Scandal

Best Visual ASSets: Game of Thrones

Best Use of Tied-Together Sticks: True Detective

Best Yelling at Jon Hamm in a Time Jump: Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation

Best Dance Scene With Four Clones: Tatiana Maslany, Orphan Black

Best Dance Party as an Exit: Sandra Oh and Ellen Pompeo, Grey's Anatomy

Best Sex While Crying in a Hospital Bed: Mae Whitman and Matt Lauria, Parenthood

Best Return From the Dead: Sherlock

Best Divisive Finale: How I Met Your Mother

Best Full Frontal in the Snow: Alexander Skarsgard, True Blood

Best Creepy Threesome: House of Cards

Best Metaphoric Explosion Followed by a Literal Explosion: Pretty Little Liars

Best Unexpected Penis-Size Reference: Orange Is the New Black

Best Lumberjack Ending: Dexter

Best Earnest Effort in Making Americans Look Dumb: I Wanna Marry "Harry"

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