Preparing for the Baby

Pregnancy

How We (Finally) Found a Great Name for Our Second Child

Naming our first son, Bowie, was an absolute breeze.

How We (Finally) Found a Great Name for Our Second Child

Naming our first son, Bowie, was an absolute breeze. The first time I saw the name, I knew that that if we had a boy, that would be it. It was the perfect blend of cute, quirky, fun, unique and cool. The origin was even connected to our heritage, which is a big deal for us. There just was no other option.

On our car ride home from the 20-week ultrasound, where we found out we were, in fact, having a boy, I told my husband about the name. He, too was instantly sold. From that moment on, our son had a name.

And when he was born and we finally spilled the beans to everyone else about what his name was, they all thought it was great too. People love it, it's a great name, and I'm so glad I found it!

But now, we've got a second son, due in three weeks, to find a name for. And it has been the hugest challenge! How do you follow such a perfect name? How will we ever find something that fits all of our criteria: within our heritage, unique but not too "out there", and just really cool? And if we pick the "wrong" name, will he feel shafted?

And then add to all of this the fact the my first name and my husband's first name begin with B, and we (totally not on purpose) chose a B name for our first son. There's a lot of pressure to choose another B name, and there just is no B name jumping out at me. So, we've already chosen to forgo that option. And now, I'm saddled with guilt that he'll feel left out.

 

I have had a really hard time finding a name that hits me like a ton of bricks the way Bowie did the first time around. But there is one name we both like a lot, and that we've finally settled on: Ferris. It's relevant to our heritage, short, fun, semi-unique, and it didn't just jump right off the page of that baby name book. I really hope that this name doesn't make our second son feel any less cool than our first!

Naming kids is so hard. You're sending them off into the world, branded forever by the name you choose for them. People will make assumptions about them and form their whole opinion around them based just on that first name. Talk about pressure! But, there are some truly horrendous names out there, and I guess at least we can say we're not using one of those. Right?

Did you feel any pressure when choosing names for your child(ren)?

Image Source: morguefile

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

Being A Mom Without Having A Mom

Much of what we know about being a mom - good and bad - comes from what we learned in our own families.

Being A Mom Without Having A Mom

Much of what we know about being a mom - good and bad - comes from what we learned in our own families. SO what is it like to be a mom when — either by circumstance or by choice — you don’t have a mother of your own to lean on?

Many of us struggle to find that missing source of knowledge, support, and day-to-day help that other women find in their own mothers. We work to fill both the void in our own lives and our children’s need for a grandmother. Here I've gathered experiences and advice from other "motherless moms" on finding the support you need to be a great mom.

Getting Through Pregnancy

Being pregnant with your first child means countless questions and concerns that require a mom's knowledge. This can be an especially painful time for soon-to-be moms who don't have their mother around for advice. Sabrina C. grew up with a mother who was addicted to drugs and involved in crime, so she longed for motherly love during her difficult pregnancy: "I felt like I needed a mother to turn to, to tell me what I was going through was normal, to comfort me." She assures other motherless moms that it's possible to rise above that kind of childhood loss.

Having positive people in your life to help you during pregnancy is important, but it doesn't have to be your mom. There are many places to turn to right in your community. Louise G. recommends signing up for parenting classes, where you will learn some valuable skills and can meet other women in your area due to give birth around the same time as you.

While it's nice to have a woman's point of view for advice, don't forget about your husband or partner. Sometimes a good relationship is all you need to get through the ups and downs of being pregnant. Heather K. found a new appreciation for her husband when she became pregnant: "We talk more about our future and have become closer in other ways, more cuddling and really intimate conversations we did not have as much before."

 

Women who don't know much about their mother or her health history face another challenge. In addition to the emotional journey of pregnancy, moms like Sherry P. have many unanswered questions. "When I got pregnant, I knew nothing about her medical history or her pregnancy, labor or delivery. I was born in 1971 and fathers apparently weren't allowed in delivery rooms, so my dad doesn't know anything," she says.

The March of Dimes recommends learning as much as you can about your family's medical history, before or during pregnancy, to help your doctor prepare for your labor and delivery. The March of Dimes provides a free family health questionnaire that can be sent to relatives to help you gather information about everything from fun family traits like hair color and height, to illnesses and birth defects that can be hereditary. The March Of Dimes website also has great advice for finding information about the medical history of your mother if she is deceased.

Mom Groups

Some moms find comfort as they share their personal pain and struggles with other women in the Circle of Moms communities. While it certainly helps, it's no substitute for having friends to lean on in your local community who are a part of your daily life. As Victoria C. says, "talking with people that are going through the same things you are is sure to open you up because you can relate to them." This is especially true for moms who are missing their own mothers. Finding friends who can relate to those emotions can make a big difference.

If you're looking for mom friends, Jessica W. suggests visiting your local library's story time, as well as browsing national websites for local mom groups such as MOMS Club. Play dates and organized activities for babies and kids offer a great way to meet other moms, too.

(For more ideas on finding new friends, check out 5 Ways to Make Friends When You're A Mom.)

 

Sub-Mom

"Sub-Mom" is a term used by a member named Stacey when she talks about the love and support she found from her friend's mom. She confides that it's been hard for her to trust or have relationships with other women, so finding a mother figure she can look up to in a friend's mom is better than nothing.

Is it really possible to replace your mother? Maybe not, but you might be surprised how much it helps to have a more experienced mom in your life. Cindy S. lost her mother when she was only 13 years old, and shares how hard it was growing up without any women to look up to. She has since found that missing bond with her mother-in-law: "I am so close to my mother-in-law. I love her so much and I'm so thankful I was able to get a mother-in-law that I get along with."

Tiffany V. puts the idea of finding a mom replacement into great perspective when she acknowledges that you're going to feel lost and alone at times, but sometimes all you have to do is look and you will find help all around you: "What I found was that there are other people who were willing to be mom for me, and support me in raising my son. Let other people help you, and be willing to let them in."

If you don't have a friend's mom or mother-in-law that you can turn to, moms also recommend looking to your church, or in your neighborhood for women who can provide support.

Your Inner Strength

Advice and friendships are great, but the most important thing that will guide you through being a mom is your own inner strength and love for your child. Bethany G. assures moms that it's possible to break the cycle of bad parenting and use your past to be a better mom: "I no longer feel that surge of self-judgement or fear that I will 'be like her' because at this point, I have proven myself again and again as a mother, and I have developed an unconditional love for myself and my son – something she was never brave enough to do."

 

Kenda C. also draws strength from what she learned from her own mother, which was what not to do: "I am stronger because of this. I hold my kids a little tighter because of this. I tell them I love them more often. I keep the promises I make to them. I remind them how special they are to me just for being who they are. I know that there is nothing in this world that could ever make me walk away from them. I know that I've learned enough lessons to know what not to do and that only makes me a better mom."

For moms who worry about their child growing up without grandma, Pam L. has some great insight. She grew up with a loving mother of her own who was abandoned by both her mother and mother-in-law. Pam knows it hurt her mother deeply that neither grandmother wanted to have a relationship with her or her children, but she says: "I never felt the pain of them not caring because my mom loved me so much. So know in your heart that as long as you love your children you will not pass that heritage along and they will remember a loving mom – you."

Image Source: Diamond Farah via Flickr/Creative Commons

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

Why My Second Pregnancy Is Better

I will spare you the bemoaning that surely accompanies a second pregnancy, because, girlfriends, it is not comfortable.

Why My Second Pregnancy Is Better

I will spare you the bemoaning that surely accompanies a second pregnancy, because, girlfriends, it is not comfortable. While I'm sure I took the brunt of some first-pregnancy discomforts, the second time around (especially so soon after first) is just altogether painful sometimes. I know that the hip pains and back aches and stomach stretching (even bigger still!) will all be worth it in a few [hopefully] brief weeks, and I try to focus on that in the morning instead of the painful reality that is rolling out of bed.

That said, though, there are a few reasons why my second pregnancy has been significantly easier than my first. And that's not to say that I'm enjoying it more or even favor one over the other; it's just a simple fact: some things are really good this time that weren't last time.

1. I'm not as worried.

When I was pregnant with my first, every little thing got to me. Every "bubble" in my stomach or day I was positive I didn't feel the baby move enough — each tiny detail, was enough to make me jump and sweat and cringe and worry like I suppose any first-time mom-to-be does. This time, I'm more prepared for those little jabs in the butt or even the days when baby is feeling sleepy and just not moving as much. I'm simply not as worried.

2. I'm a mom already.

Boy, was I smart choosing to be pregnant all summer, huh?! But honestly, I spent the first two-thirds of this pregnancy forgetting that I was, in fact, pregnant, thanks to my high-energy one-year-old. Even the days when I felt sicker than I'd have liked or just more tired, I had an incredible, bubbly, exciting distraction: Already being a mommy to my beautiful baby girl. 

3. I'm exercising.

I did not heed this advice last time I was pregnant. Overwhelmed with 18-weeks of morning sickness to kick-off a rather unexpected pregnancy, I settled into couch potato mode very early on. This time, as I mentioned above, that's not an option. My days are filled with running at the park, going on walks, and chasing after a toddler who is bound to get into everything. When I have the energy, I try to do some pre-natal exercises too. It has made all the difference in how I look and how I feel. I'm gaining just a very healthy amount of weight and I feel less sluggish — even at 30 weeks in the middle of August!

 

4. I'm more emotionally mature.

Whether or not you were planning to be a mommy, I think pinpointing your emotions in your first pregnancy can be tricky. There is so much to take on, to work out, all in the face of this big unknown event. Already having experienced all that and being on "the other side" of motherhood, I feel like I'm tackling this second pregnancy with a sense of emotional maturity. I still have my days where I break down and feel bad (depression during pregnancy and not just after is a very real thing!); but this time I know what's coming. I know the joy of my baby being born into the world, of being her mommy, of watching her grow. And this time I'm able to look forward to it with expectation.

5. I have confidence in confidence alone!

Oh, why thank you random stranger giving me baby advice or telling me that my OB is wrong, I'm actually having a boy; but I've been pregnant before, and I'm totally able to carry on during my day without your words ringing in my head. When I was pregnant with my first, I took everything to heart, even the things coming from complete strangers. I think it's hard not to. And I'm not trying to say I have it all figured out — I certainly don't — but I have a certain confidence in being both pregnant and a mommy this time around. It makes it easier to casually thank all the advice-givers, take their words with a grain of salt, and smile that, this time, I already know the answers to a lot of questions.

Of course, every pregnancy is different. In fact, this pregnancy has been so different from my first, for awhile I was convinced I was having a boy! It's been fun to experience my pregnancies so differently. During the first, I had those sweet moments of intimacy and silence, readying my heart as best I could for what I didn't know, preparing for the first little one to come to our home. And this time, with experience under my belt and a house bursting with love already, we are simply preparing to multiply that. But with the heat still pounding at our front door and my 18-month-old hitting a sleeping lapse, I am so grateful that I can say, this pregnancy has been easier. Thank you, little one!

Image Source: Sarah Ann Noel

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

4 Pregnancy Must-Haves

I'm in a much better state of mind this pregnancy than I was with my first.

4 Pregnancy Must-Haves

I'm in a much better state of mind this pregnancy than I was with my first. But emotionally and psychologically sound or not, I'm not one of those women who loves being pregnant. In fact, I don't like much about it at all, save for the fact that at the end of it all, we'll have a glorious and lovely new little daughter. Other than that, I'm pretty uncomfortable most of the time.

So I've got a little go-to list, my pregnancy must-haves. With these items, my discomfort can be alleviated, clearing my head to focus on that part I like — the part about having a little girl soon.

1. Milk and Honey for Heartburn

My number one pregnancy symptom is heartburn. And while the wives' tale proved true last time--Iris was born with tons of hair!--sometimes the intensity of my reflux is unbearable. My OB/GYN is comfortable with me regularly taking Zantac; and when the going gets too tough, I will pop a pill from time to time. But ultimately, I like to avoid medicines while pregnant. Just a personal preference. And so, I've found that an ice cold glass of milk can soothe my stomach quite a bit, especially if I drink it right before a meal. When that doesn't work, I also throw back a spoonful of honey, a proven natural remedy if your stomach is producing too much acid. (I've also heard apple cider vinegar if you're short on acid production, but this doesn't work for me when I'm pregnant.)

2. My Favorite Body Pillow for Sleep

Nothing beats a good night's sleep when you're pregnant. In fact, it's a must. But let's face it: That is a commodity harder and harder to come by the more pregnant you become. Between sore boobs, widening hips, and an ever-growing belly, sleep turns into a chore rather than a luxury. There are all sorts of special pillows out there to aid in pregnant sleeping; and for me, the Snoogle takes the cake. It's perfectly shaped to support all my areas of need--hips, boobs, stomach, and back--all at once. I sleep like a baby with this bad boy, and it's really useful for postpartum sleeping and nursing too.

 

3. A Reusable Water Bottle for Hydration

Maybe I'm a walking Colorado cliche to never leave the house without my reusable water bottle; but when you live a mile high, you've got to stay hydrated. And mamas growing humans out there know that, when you're pregnant or nursing, hydration is key. It's easy for me to through my empty water bottle into the diaper bag and fill up at our various pit stops throughout the day.

4. A Body Cream for Stretch Marks

The effectiveness of this remains to be seen for me. When I was pregnant with Iris, despite all the oils and creams I tried, my entire body was laden with stretch marks. I hear it's genetic, yet I'm still trying to beat the odds. This time around, I'm trying the Clarins stretch mark system; I'm 27 weeks in and so far no new stretch marks. (I'll report back when it's all said and done.) And using the oil and lotion (both 100 percent botanical, don't worry!) adds a little luxury to this pregnancy for me. They both smell delightful and help me take a few extra minutes for myself during the day.

What are your best pregnancy recommendations?

Image Source: Sarah Ann Noel

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

8 Easy Tips Every New Mommy Should Know

Let's just say I am not a new mom.

8 Easy Tips Every New Mommy Should Know

Let's just say I am not a new mom. I suppose I am a "been there done that mom" (which sounds so much better than "older mom"). I have learned so many things I wish I had known back then, and here are eight of them. I learned these with my first and they have served me well through the years.

1. A Poem That Soothes

Memorize Wynken Blynken and Nod. It is an old, soft, absolutely lovely poem that every momma should know by heart to soothe and/or entertain her child.

2. Puree and Hide the Veggies

Blend and puree a cup of organic carrots, beets or spinach to add to your fabulous pot of spaghetti, chili or anything else you are making. Your children will never know, and when they do not want to eat their veggies that evening, you will be okay with it.

3. Pick Your Battles

It really just is not the end of the world if little one does not want to eat his broccoli you over-cooked to begin with. It really is okay that his room did not get cleaned today. Relax a little.

4. Ignore Disapproving Glances

Mommas, when your toddler is pitching (and he or she will) a horrible fit in the market, never, never look around to all the disapproving glances of "my child would never do that." It distracts you from your child's needs at the time. They are lying anyway, their kids did throw tantrums, it is also none of their business.

 

5. Always Carry Snacks

If your child is "acting up", think...what have they eaten in the last hour?  A glass of organic milk and a granola bar might just do the trick. This also goes for fussy teens as well, they sometimes forget to eat.

6. Go for Toys that Inspire Creativity

Always, inspire their creativity! What do they like? Not, what do you want them to like. Crayons, art supplies, LEGOs, building blocks and of course fabulous picture books bring out their creativity in ways that nothing else does.

7. Trust Yourself

Think for yourself, you are the mom.  Do not always look to "experts" for advice.  God gave you maternal instinct for a good reason.

8. Speak to Your Child with Respect

Always talk and respond to your child with love and calmness. Yes, we moms are the busiest people on the planet, but our children deserve nothing less than our best. 

Image Source: Kate Ter Haar via Flickr/Creative Commons

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Baby

4 Ways to Make Cloth Diapering A Breeze

Patty H. decided a while ago to use cloth diapers rather than disposables, but now that this she's expecting her first baby and doing some research, she doesn’t know what methods or products would be helpful.  “Every time I go to a site, it’s so full of information and now I am confused more than ever,” she rues.

4 Ways to Make Cloth Diapering A Breeze

Patty H. decided a while ago to use cloth diapers rather than disposables, but now that this she's expecting her first baby and doing some research, she doesn’t know what methods or products would be helpful. 

“Every time I go to a site, it’s so full of information and now I am confused more than ever,” she rues. “What type of diapers are the best ones to use? What is the difference between a pre-fold, fitted, all-in-one and homemade? Which are easier — pins, snaps or Velcro? I noticed that some use liners and others don't, and some require a cover. How can I tell which ones do?” 

The idea of cloth diapering can sound daunting to a newbie, but Circle of Moms members who are experienced with them reassure that the equipment and cleanup process are not complicated to learn. Here they offer four tips that make cloth diapering as easy as using disposables.

1. Decide Which Type of Diaper to Use

Today, parents don’t have to bother with the old fashioned (and unwieldy) cloth diapering regimen of folding and pinning if they don’t want to, according to Circle of Moms member Jan M. “There are tons of different types of diapers” that don’t involve prepping a diaper before using it and potentially poking your baby with a pin. The options, as she describes, include:

  • All-in-ones – These generally are the most expensive and work similar to disposable diapers in terms of how you put them on and take them off, with either snaps or Velcro.
  • Pockets - These cost and work about the same as all-in-ones, except you have to stuff an absorbent layer into them through an opening in the back. “[This] is slightly more work, but they dry faster and you can customize the absorbency by adding extra soakers for overnight or car trips and what not,” Jan notes.
  • All in twos - These come with a waterproof cover that you stuff or snap a soaker layer into. “These are nice because you only have to wash the outside part if it gets poop on it; otherwise you just toss a new soaker into it and away you go,” Jan adds.
  • Fitteds and covers – This refers to a two-part system that includes a fitted cloth diaper that closes with Velcro or snaps, plus an added waterproof cover. “These are nice because you can use different types of covers on them as needed, and they are fairly affordable, last a long time and generally are easy to wash without a lot of fuss,” explains Jan.
  • Prefolds – These often are the cheapest and are sewn like a flat diaper that has already been folded so there are more layers in the middle. Prefolds can be fastened with pins or with rubber, T-shaped diaper fasteners, called Snappis. Moms also can use a prefold and lay it in a cover.
  • Flats - “What your grandmother used to diaper her babies with,” Jan says, describing them as a square of cotton flannel that you fold and fasten onto your baby, and then put a cover over. “In most cases, prefolds are actually cheaper then flats because they are more common,” she notes. For covers, moms have about four options: plastic pants; polyurethane-lined covers (PULs); polarfleece; and natural fibers like bamboo, hemp or wool. 

 

2. Experiement to Find a Good Fit

When choosing from among the many cloth diapering options, the key factor will be your budget and how well a type of diaper type fits on your baby. Very often, moms need to experiment to find out which ones are easiest to put on and won’t leak. “You just kind of have to give it a spin and find out as you go along,” Marissa J. relays.

For a newborn and a beginning diaperer, a member named Vilate recommends prefolds because they are less bulky for a little baby than all-in-ones or pocket diapers. The fit can change over as your baby grows, so when ”your baby gets bigger [at] about 4 months, you can start to try out different diapers. Try out different ones until you find what works for you,” she suggests.

Another reason to try different styles is because one type might be better at keeping rashes at bay, Jan M. notes. “Rashes happen no matter what kind of diaper you use. Some kids are prone to them and others aren't,” she says. For instance, her son was part-time cloth diapered and never had rash, but her daughter would get a rash if she wore disposable diapers or used plastic cloth diaper covers, no matter which brands she tried. 

The good news, says Cory O., is that many diaper sites have variety packs to allow moms to sample the different cloth diapering options.

Or, Marissa suggests moms search Craigslist to purchase different used styles second-hand.

3. How to Handle Dirty Diapers

Once moms ensure a proper fit on their babies, Circle of Moms members suggest a few products to help make cleanup a breeze. Liners can be used to line the inside of cloth diapers and make disposing of solids easier. They can be used for extra absorbency. Or, they can be used when your baby has a rash and you need to apply diaper cream but don’t want to get the cream on the diaper (creams usually hinder absorbency), members Vilate and Kate advise.

Vilate also suggests getting a sprayer to hose-off solids. “You'll love it, and it will make diapering so much less yucky!” 

Generally, moms like Liza G. recommend moms store diapers in a dry pail — rather than in a pail filled with water — until laundry day so that you don’t have to fool with sticking your hands in stinky water, or emptying and washing the bucket.

Jordan K. uses a Diaper Genie as her dry pail, which she says contains smells until the diapers are laundered.  

 

4.  How to Eliminate Smells and Stains

When enough diapers have accumulated to fill a washing machine, several moms recommend first running the diapers through a cold water cycle, and then washing them with soap in hot water followed by another cold water rinse.

The first cold water rinse reduces staining, Jennifer R. explains. And especially in front loader washing machines, the double cold rinse cycles help get the diapers sufficiently wet to get clean. 

If stains don’t come out in the wash, then a member named Kate suggests line-drying the diapers in the sun. “Sunning is awesome for getting out the stains. I mean crazy fast and almost miraculous. Wish it would work like that on other clothes!” she says. 

Several moms also suggest using additives like baking soda while washing, to help reduce stains and odors. To prevent bacteria from building up, Jordan K. puts hydrogen peroxide in the hot water cycle; she doesn’t have a sanitizing cycle on her washing machine.

However, Majaliwa B. cautions against adding vinegar to the wash because although it’s great for killing bacteria, it can cause the special PULs fabric (fabric laminated with a waterproof backing) to break down over time.

As an alternative to doing the dirty washing yourself, moms Lori S. and Kerry suggest signing up for a diaper service. You then just have to use liners to easily discard the waste, put the diapers in a pail for the service to pick up once a week, and the service takes and leaves a week’s worth. “[The] diaper service could not have been easier … you never even had to rinse the diapers … in fact you were told not to. I would recommend this to anyone,” Kerry says.

Cloth diapering at first might seem difficult when moms read about the process, but experienced parents reassure that you will quickly catch on and develop your own routine for making dressing and cleaning easy.

“Trust me, you will catch up to the rest of the cloth diapering community in no time flat! You just have to get started somewhere, and you will see what I mean. All of a sudden you will become an expert,” Marissa J. says. “Best of all, you never have to run out to the store on an emergency run for diapers.”

Image Source: simplyla via Flickr/Creative Commons

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

Why I'm Thrilled to Have Another Girl

Well, if you haven't heard the news, we're pregnant again!

Why I'm Thrilled to Have Another Girl

Well, if you haven't heard the news, we're pregnant again! And further, though I was positively convinced that we'd be having a son, just a few weeks ago I was proven wrong. Instead we are preparing to welcome a second little girl into our lives! Iris and the new babe will be a mere 20 months apart, and it got my wheels turning about how these two angels will surely become the best of friends. At least that's my hope!

I had my own sister growing up. There was a larger gap in our age and we were very different — different interests, different personalities, different circles. But even for all that stood between us, there were a few things that drew us close — then and now — simply because we were and are sisters. Sisterhood is a special bond. You're bound to hate each other and love each other; but no matter what, some things between sisters always stand tried and true

Based on all that my sister and I shared, here's what I hope will be the same for Iris and her new little "bubbah." (Ahem, that's "baby" in Iris-speak.)

1. Coordinating Outfits

I mean, is this a given, obvious, even shallow point to make? Perhaps. But when my sister and I were young, we dressed like twins all the time. And, naturally, the outfits I'm remembering were from an age where I was old enough to force her into costume; but still, whilst I have the control over my little girls' wardrobes, I'm just imagining the combinations I can create. Picture-worthy for sure.

The good news is, this also includes closet-sharing. All those outfits that were SO darling (and far too expensive) that Iris only got to wear once? Well, saints be praised! They'll see the light of day again, and somehow that will justify that one time I went on a Janie and Jack splurge. Once they're older, they may even enjoy sharing each other's closets. I don't think my sister minded my hand-me-downs; and we certainly like to peruse each other's clothes now!

 

2. Sharing a Room

Our tiny little Denver bungalow offers no extra space for even our family of three, and so my kids will be sharing the nursery. Obviously, if we'd had a boy, this would have worked just fine for quite some time. But now that I know we're having a girl, somehow the room sharing seems a luxury! I can just make it the cutest little space for them and have all our precious girly things in one darling place. They can set up kitchen and doll cradles and art easels, to share and create together.

My sister and I shared a room for quite awhile. When I think back to even those times when we weren't the best of friends, it was sharing a room that helped us remember why we loved one another. It's like a sleepover every night, and those nights you can't sleep, the silly stories and the giggling just come spilling out. I can't wait for my girls to have that time together.

3. Always Having a Companion

When you're little, everything is made more fun with a friend: trips to the grocery store, forced quiet time, vacations. When you have a sister, you always have a companion around. My sister and I were the best of friends on a lot of our vacations and road trips. It was so nice to have a buddy along, to share in the experiences and to pass the time. 

With my little girls so close in age too, they'll be taking on life together. As one moves into one phase, the other will always be following close behind, so I love that they'll never be too far removed from where the other is. I, of course, expect them to have their own friends and to do things independently; but I hope that they also recognize the joy of always having a partner in life (and, I imagine, crime).

 

4. Always Having a Confidante

I'm ridiculously close to my mother. I never felt the need to hide things from her because she always accepted me and was loving and encouraging. But she was still my mom. And I'll never forget the first time that I talked to my sister about something, something that I'd not told anyone, not even my mom. Telling my sister was like telling my mom, because she is family; she accepted me and was loving and encouraging too. But being my sister, she was more my peer, not an authority figure. It was freeing to recognize that I had that ability to share with her, that I could be wholly myself and honest on a different level than I could with a parent. And my sister has trusted me in the same way. A sister is so often the best place to bounce ideas and secrets because she knows you and loves you like family, but can take on the world with you like a friend.

5. Disney World!

I don't have specific sisterly memories of my sister and I at Disney World together, though we've made the trip several times in our lives. But for some reason, when we found out we were having a girl, the first thing I said to Trevor was, "Omigosh! Can't you wait to take the girls to Disney World?" So,I suppose it's just a little bit of my own childhood self that I'll be forcing on to my two little gals. But I think they'll like it. 

Image Source: Sarah Gries

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

When Pregnancy and Labor Don't Go As Planned

I had every intention of being an earth momma when I became pregnant with my son.

When Pregnancy and Labor Don't Go As Planned

I had every intention of being an earth momma when I became pregnant with my son. I wanted to do things naturally and according to the way nature intended it. I booked a midwife and we talked about a natural delivery.  I attended prenatal yoga classes, kept up my visits to the gym and ate only organic, antibiotic free everything.  I read about breast feeding, attachment parenting and how to ease the baby into the world.  It sounded wonderful.  The books made it look easy. Then life happened. 

At 20 weeks an anomaly was noticed on our ultrasound. After meeting with a specialist we found out our son had a Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia and he had a 50% survival rate.  They told us we would have to change our plans.  I’d see a MFM instead of a Midwife. I’d deliver at the hospital an hour away from our home. Our son would require surgery and a long stay in the NICU. It wouldn’t look anything like what we had planned. 

I was terrified of course.  Afraid he wouldn’t make it I did everything I could to stay healthy to give him a fighting chance.  I continued eating well and working out. I meditated and took time off.  Everything was sailing along and then at 37 weeks my water broke unexpectedly. Just days before my doctor had been talking about an induction at 40 weeks as he didn’t think we should leave the baby in their longer for his health. 

Needless to say I was not prepared.  We arrived at the hospital with almost nothing.  Within 14 hours we had a baby and my labor was eased with the help of medications. The nausea was overwhelming. I managed to touch my babies head before the whisked him into the NICU. I heard one cry before they intubated him. 

After I was moved into my room I lay in bed while my husband slept thinking of the events of the past day.  I wasn’t disappointed, I was elated. My son had arrived. My son had cried and fought for his life. I heard his voice.  I touched his head. We had connected outside the womb.

 


I didn’t see him until 8 o’clock in the morning as I had to wait for rounds to be finished. I began pumping as soon as I could.  I visited daily but didn’t get to hold him until he was 20 days old. The swine flu was going around at the time so we couldn’t have visitors with us.  He fought pneumonia and struggled to breathe while we watched him recover. I brought him home at a 29 days old a weeping, elated mess.  He was alive.  I was alive.  None of what happened up to that point mattered. 

My birth plan was left on the floor. Both of them. Nothing went as it was supposed to but he survived and I was a mother. Life was good.

No matter what happens when you give birth, no matter how many things don’t go your way remember that you’ll be a mother when it’s over. The good, the bad and the ugly are all just part of the journey to bring your little one into the world.  Sometimes it doesn’t go perfectly. Sometimes it’s not just as you planned but in the end all that matters is your little one. 

As I begin thinking of my next child and what I would like the experience to be like I know there are still some things I want, still some things I would aim for but nothing is written in stone.  In the end all that matters is a healthy baby and that’s all a mother could ask for. 

Image Source: Becky @ From Ministry to Motherhood

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

Pregnancy

Hospital Bag Checklist: The 9 Essentials to Pack for Labor

Wondering what to pack in your hospital bag?

Hospital Bag Checklist: The 9 Essentials to Pack for Labor

Wondering what to pack in your hospital bag? Who better to ask than moms who've already been through labor? Below we share the nine essentials that Circle of Moms members say will ease your visit to the hospital — and your return home with your new baby in tow.

1. Toiletries

Essentials in the toiletry bags of Circle of Moms members include: a hairbrush, shampoo and conditioner, deodorant, toothbrush and toothpaste, contacts and glasses, hair elastics, makeup (there will be lots of picture taking), a razor, a hairdryer and baby nail clippers. And Brenda D. adds that “Lip balm is a must! Between the dry hospital air and the heavy panting you'll do during labor, the lips get mighty dry!"

2. Clothes for Mom

In addition to socks and slippers to protect your feet from icy hospital floors and your own nightgown to make you feel more comfortable, many moms emphasize the importance of bringing a go-home outfit that will fit. As Jill E. shares: “Make sure to have very comfy (but elastic) pants. I packed maternity pants like everyone told me to and they fell off, so my mom ran to Wal-mart and bought some capri-like sweatpants.”

3. Entertainment

I wish I'd brought a book to read,” says Molissa A. Many other moms echo her advice, recommending books, magazines, DVDs, and an iPod to pass the time.

4. Snacks

Snacks for you and your partner are another hospital bag essential if you prefer to avoid vending machine fare when the hospital café is closed. And for mom?  Rebecca C. says she would bring “non-sweet juice or some fruit for energy,” while Ashley B. swears by hard candy: “If you are a major dry mouth sufferer like me, don't forget the lollipops or hard candy. They are my lifesavers.”

5. Baby Clothes

“I would take a few different sizes of clothes for baby,” Jodi B. wisely cautions. Larger babies may not fit in the tiniest newborn sizes, while preemies will be swimming in them!

6. Nursing and Maxi Pads

“Don't forget to pack pads,” cautions Sarah B. “I HATED the hospital's. I felt like I was wearing a diaper. I made my husband go run and buy me some normal size pads.” Jessica P. agrees, calling nursing pads and extra-heavy flow maxi pads a must: “The ones the hospital provides are ridiculous and uncomfortable.”

7. Pillow

Are you planning to breastfeed? Catherine B. advises bringing a nursing pillow like the Boppy. Other moms like bringing their own pillow from home to make them more comfortable during labor. As Missy D. shares: “I took my own pillow and night gown AND slippers. Take everything that will make you comfortable!!”

8. Earplugs

The one item Victoria G. recommends bringing? "Earplugs! I know it sounds silly but even if you just put them in one ear (so you can hear your baby with the other ear) it drowns outs a lot of the hospital noise while you are trying to rest at different times of the day/night. It also helps block out laboring mothers who can be a bit noisy lol!"

9. Camera, Cell Phone, and Call List

Cameras and phones are essential for taking first photos and sharing news with loved ones. Many moms wisely recommend bringing a call/text/email list so you don’t forget anyone. As Amanda H. shares “Sometimes you just get so caught up in the moment you forget.” Remember to bring chargers and extra batteries, too!

Pregnancy

Top 10 Essential Baby Items

Feeling overwhelmed by all the products on the market for new babies, and wondering which are truly essentials that other moms swear by?

Top 10 Essential Baby Items

Feeling overwhelmed by all the products on the market for new babies, and wondering which are truly essentials that other moms swear by? Aside from safe cribs and car seats, Circle of Moms members say these 10 baby products are the must-haves they couldn’t have lived without.

1. Baby Sling or Carrier

From Moby wraps to Mei Tais, baby slings and wraps earn high praise from moms for enabling hands-free carrying. As Stasia K. shares of her Ergo Baby Carrier, “My daughter has spent half of her life in it and LOVES IT. From there she can safely see and learn from the world around her while I have two free hands to do the housework, walk the dog, make dinner, etc.”

2. Bouncy Chairs and Swings

I don't know what I would do without my bouncy chair,” says Mallory C., one of countless moms who say swings, bouncers and rockers were essential for entertainment and sleeping. Melissa S. remembers: “I was SO grateful to have a baby swing, that's the only way I could get her to sleep for the first 6 weeks.”

3. Boppy Pillow

This wildly popular U-shaped pillow is one of the most beloved baby products around. Amanda C. explains its multipurpose allure: “I found it so useful for breastfeeding, for keeping baby elevated after feeding when he was a newborn, (and for) extra support when my little brother held my son. When he got older he would sit in it (in case he fell back) to play, and sometimes nap in it! I love the Boppy.”

4. Swaddling Blankets

Baby swaddling blankets are wonders,” advises Natashia M. “Especially for fussy babies.” While some moms are partial to certain fabrics, features and brands (as in flannel, Velcro or Miracle Blankets), the general consensus is that swaddling blankets are simply amazing.

5. Nipple Cream and Nursing Pads

Sore and leaking nipples? Ouch! Numerous nursing moms agree with Bethany B. that Lansinoh nipple cream and nursing pads are a “gift from God” for easing discomfort. (Medela creams are popular, too).

6. White Noise

Whether it's a machine that emits ocean waves, heartbeats and "womb sounds," or the radio turned to hushed static, some kind of white noise maker is a must-have for many new moms. Denise T. shares: “My husband just burned a CD from the Internet and we just used a CD player on repeat, works like a charm.”

7. Breast Pump

A high-quality pump is a must-have for many breastfeeding moms, especially those who work outside the home. As Stephanie F. advises: ""I know it may seem expensive - but a GREAT breast pump will save you time, money and frustration!" Hannah H. agrees: “Do invest in Medela or another hospital-grade one."

8. Mylicon

When colic and gassiness strike, moms like Jessica H. say Mylicon is incredibly helpful: “MYLICON!! Oh my Gosh, I have a gassy baby! This is without a doubt my number one item.” (See also 9 Essentials for a Nursery First-Aid Kit).

9. The Hooter Hider

“I don’t leave the house without my Hooter Hider,” admits Kelly M., and she's far from the only one. Many moms love how this nursing cover allows discreet breastfeeding in public. Karen S. agrees, calling it “an absolute essential for nursing.”

10. Lots of Burp Cloths

Candace C.’s one must-have baby item? “8 billion baby face cloths." The truth is, you're going to need something (make that a lot of somethings) to wipe up the steady stream of drool and spit up that babies so expertly produce. As Alison W. advises, “You can't have too many little cloths!!!

Image Source: devinf via Flickr/Creative Commons