Tina Belcher's 26-Step Guide to Being a Smart, Strong, Sensual Woman
If you don't watch Bob's Burgers, you are missing out on one of the greatest female characters of all time (who is, ironically, voiced by a man): Tina Belcher. Tina truly is our past, present, and future, as she is the awkward, misfit teen many of us can relate to, but she's also a sexually adventurous woman who's not afraid to write erotic friend fiction and slap some butts along the way. We could all take a cue from the bespectacled middle schooler in our love lives and journey through womanhood.
Repeat After Tina . . .
You Gotta Kiss a Lot of Frogs Before Finding Your Prince
Don't Be Afraid to Be Curious About Sexuality
Let Your Erotic Freak Flag Fly
Give That Cutie Your Number
Don't Deny Your Sexual Needs
"Just when I think I'm out, those cheeks pull me right back in."
Work On Your Sensual Dance Moves
Let Yourself Sulk After a Breakup
Don't Underestimate a Good Hair Flip
Have a Dance-Off When Deciding Between Two Love Interests
"A pants-off for me?" "No, a dance-off." "That's almost as good."
It's OK to Date Around
Some Thoughts Should Stay Private . . .
Like your crotch issues.
Don't Give Up on Your Dream Significant Other
This Is How You Kick Someone Out of Your Bed
If You Have a Crush, Go For It
"I am both attracted to and intimidated by Jimmy Jr.'s interpretive mating dance."
If You're Going to Go Through a Rebellious Phase, Make Sure Your Tattoo Is Temporary
It's Important to Keep Your Options Open
Flirting Doesn't Have to Be Subtle
But There's Always Plan C
"We can make this work. We can work out a dating wheel, just like a chore wheel. Let's put the try in triangle."
Don't Let Your Mom Pressure You Into a Relationship
It's Perfectly Acceptable to Spend an Extended Amount of Time on the Floor After a Bad Day
You Can Find Inspiration to Spice Up Your Sex Life in, Um, Unexpected Places
"I'm working on a new erotic fan fiction, it's called 'The Hobbutt: An Unexpected Orgy'."
"Robots? But that does give me ideas for a new erotic fan fiction. 'Ro-Butts'."
You Never Know Where You'll Meet Your Soul Mate
Like the grocery store.
Or your Capoeira class