"Gourmet" Pregnancy Craving Cookbook Is the Most Hysterical Thing Ever

Updated on 5/18/2017 at 11:35 AM

Coconut custard pie and olives — that's what my mom says she craved when she was pregnant with me. But that combination is definitely not the most bizarre craving that has been had by a woman eating for two — in fact, some pregnant women get non-food cravings as well. During pregnancy the body wants what the body wants (though we don't recommend actually eating things that aren't edible).

Vicky Jacob-Ebbinghaus and Juarez Rodrigues both work in advertising, but as a side project they thought it would be interesting (and funny) to bring weird pregnancy cravings to life by actually preparing, eating, photographing, and critiquing them — all for a cookbook. Eating For Two — which now officially goes by Pickles and Ice Cream — was created after the duo read research about pregnancy cravings, and they chose meals to create based on submissions of cravings from real pregnant women.

Vicky told POPSUGAR, "We really enjoyed recreating the recipes and imagining what they would taste like before we tried them. There was also a bit of schadenfreude watching the other person try the dishes, too — we laughed quite a lot." We're betting that the book will adorn coffee tables all over the world, as it's not only well photographed, but hilarious.

Read through to see the surprisingly beautiful meals, read the hysterical reviews of each dish (which were based off "a complicated system of mood and personal taste"), and preorder Pickles and Ice Cream ($17, officially out July 11, 2017).

Mashed Potato With Caramel Sauce

Review: Not quite as tasty as mashed potato without caramel sauce or caramel sauce without mashed potato, but still strangely more-ish.

Choc-olive Cake

Review: The perfect birthday cake for your enemies.

Bacon Mars Burger

Review: It’s pretty crazy, but the good kind. Not the one that runs after teenagers in a mask with a chainsaw.

Burnt Matches

Review: The head tastes like garlicky egg and the rest tastes like nothing. All in all, the experience wasn’t terrible. Unfortunately the same couldn’t be said for our breath afterwards.

Popcorn on a Bed of Sauerkraut

Review: It’s not any worse than sauerkraut by itself.

Medley of Soaps

Review: This dish can’t be graded on our star rating because if we gave it half a star, every other dish would be 5 stars. Do not try this.

Ever.

Ignoring this warning isn’t like ignoring the expiry date on a yogurt. It’s like ignoring the warning of that wise old person in a horror movie who tells the group of teenagers, "Leave this place while you still can."

Toothpaste Oreos

Review: Chocolate and mint go really well together. Even when they taste remarkably like Oreos with toothpaste.

Steak With Ice Cream

Review: There is a special place in hell for people who ruin good steaks like this. We’ll save you a seat.

Ice Cream and Chili Sauce

Review: Horrible.

Coal

Review: Surprisingly it tasted like nothing. Slightly gritty nothing.

It gets five stars because we tried it directly after the soap and the relief that it wasn’t as horrifying as that was absolutely delicious.

Sausage and Jam

Review: We had high hopes for this one. So you could say, this is what disappointment tastes like.

Buttered Watermelon

Review: The butter takes the delicate freshness of the watermelon to new heights . . . and then pushes it off them, completely annihilating any trace of it.

Orange Sushi With Tomato Sauce Glaze

Review: The true evil in this dish is that it catches you unawares. Who doesn’t like oranges? Who doesn’t like tomato sauce? What harm could there be in putting them together? Why have I suddenly lost the will to live?

Gherkin (Pickle) Cocktail

Review: It tastes like a cup of diluted salad dressing. Not really so bad, but not the type of thing you would drink given a choice of . . . well . . . anything else ever.

Bean and Cream Dream

Review: This could best be described as a mistake. Not a terrible mistake, just a mistake. Like if you get too greedy at the buffet and end up spearing two things on your fork that you would never normally put into your mouth at the same time. But what are you going to do? It’s not bad enough to spit out. It’s not good enough to eat more of. So you just swallow it and try to avoid doing it again in the future.