15 Times Professor McGonagall Was an Absolute Queen

Updated on Feb 3, 2017 at 6:45 PM

Let's talk about Minerva McGonagall for just a second. Or for an hour. Or for the next week. Professor Have-a-Biscuit-Potter never ceases to throw us for a loop in the best way possible. Expel Harry for flying a broomstick in his first year? How about — PLOT TWIST — she actually snags him a position on the Gryffindor Quidditch team as the youngest Seeker in a century. Did she play favorites by not docking points from her own House when she caught students sneaking out after hours? Nope. She triple docks Harry, Ron, and Hermione 50 points . . . each. She's fair; she hardcore; she's snarky as hell.

Apart from relating to her on a cat-lady level, I've always loved McGonagall because I've always respected her. She doesn't go easy on her students, but she cares about them so deeply. She's unyielding, strong, and an incredibly powerful witch. Most of all, it's her unwavering loyalty to Dumbledore that warms my heart, as well as her endless pursuit of the greater good. She doesn't make allowances for much, but when she does, it feels like Christmas (she always did have a soft spot for Hagrid, didn't she?). I trust her. I'm kind of scared of her (just how thin can her lips get when when she's furious?). She's who Umbridge really had to fear. She's a badass protector and professor, and through and through, she's a witch to be reckoned with. In case you needed more proof, here are 15 times she won the wizarding the world with a flick of her wand wrist and well-landed quip.

When she helped Peeves wreak havoc on Hogwarts.

"It unscrews the other way."

When she had no patience for nonsense, ever.

"Weasley, straighten your hat. Miss Patil, take that ridiculous thing out of your hair."

When she offered Potter a biscuit.

No one hated Umbridge more than McGonagall, but she knew how to play the game better than anyone, and she did everything to help Harry do the same.

When she SHUT. UMBRIDGE. DOWN.

"Minerva you f*cking queen" is correct.

When she really wanted Gryffindor to win the Hogwarts Quidditch Cup.

She saw a Seeker in Harry, and dammit, she wanted that win so she could shove it in Snape's face.

When she sat still for a whole day just to get some reliable information on the fall of the Dark Lord.

"You’d be stiff if you'd been sitting on a brick wall all day."

When she made three Patronuses like a boss.

1) Her Patronus is a cat (aka her Animagus form), so basically McGongall's strongest form of protection is . . . herself. 2) She. Made. Three. Patronuses. At once.

When she was the one who signed off on Harry's Hogwarts acceptance letter.

"Dear Mr. Potter,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,
Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress"

Oh — McGonagall, Order of Phoenix member by night, casual deputy headmistress of Hogwarts by day.

When she stuck up for Neville.

Neville exasperated many professors, McGonagall included, over the years. But this compliment to Neville in Half-Blood Prince was the uplifting reassurance he needed — and one only someone like McGonagall could give.

When she called Hogwarts Castle to action and basically saved them all.

"Hogwarts is threatened! Man the boundaries, protect us, do your duty to our school!"

When she was fiercely protective of the Hogwarts students.

When Snape became headmaster and Alecto and Amycus Carrow were roaming the halls doling out brutal punishments, McGonagall didn't back down, Death Eaters be damned.

When she stuck up for Trelawney . . . even though she kind of didn't like Trelawney.

She didn't always see eye to eye with the more eccentric viewpoints of Sybill Trelawney, but when things got real, McGonagall stepped up to protect the Divination teacher's right to stay at Hogwarts and even offered her comfort.

When she reminded everyone that she wasn't born yesterday.

She drew herself up to her fullest height. "We shall secure the school against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named while you search for this — this object."

“Is that possible?”

“I think so,” said Professor McGonagall dryly, “we teachers are rather good at magic, you know. I am sure we will be able to hold him off for a while if we all put our best efforts into it."

When she stood firmly behind her headmaster and friend.

“So,” sneered Fudge, recovering himself, “you intend to take on Dawlish, Shacklebolt, Dolores, and myself single-handed, do you, Dumbledore?”

“Merlin’s beard, no,” said Dumbledore, smiling. “Not unless you are foolish enough to force me to.”

“He will not be single-handed!” said Professor McGonagall loudly, plunging her hand inside her robes.

“Oh yes he will, Minerva!” said Dumbledore sharply. “Hogwarts needs you!”