11 Obnoxious Noises We'd Rather Listen to Than Cicadas Buzzing
Hear that noise outside? It's billions of cicadas . . . literally. Every 17 years, a special brood of the insect emerges from underground hidey-holes (which we're imagining as something along the lines of villainous headquarters) to pester the sh*t out of certain parts of the United States. Not-so-luckily for us, that year is 2016. They're already starting to buzz, and it's only going to get worse as the full force of cicadas come out of hiding in late April.
In honor of this awful rare occasion, here are a few obnoxious sounds we'd rather listen to than those ever-present cicada noises.
Somebody chewing with their mouth open
Their bad manners pale in comparison to those stinking cicadas.
A dental drill
Root canal > cicadas.
Microphone feedback
Testing . . . testing . . . 1, 2, 3 . . . Cicadas are the worst.
Static
The static TV ghost from Poltergeist or the creepy girl who crawls out of the TV in The Ring can come take us, as long as there aren't cicadas in the afterlife.
A ringing alarm clock
The only downside: they're waking you up to go out into a world that's filled with cicadas.
Crying
Babies, grown men, don't care. They can cry all they want if it drowns out the cicadas.
Bad news
Someone stole the car? We need to talk? The flight's delayed? They're all sold out in your size? Still preferable to cicadas.
Janice from Friends
She could say "oh my god" to us anytime if she rid the world of cicadas.
"The most annoying sound in the world" from Dumb and Dumber
Remember it? Still better than cicadas.
Loud sirens
At least they mean someone's there to save you. Who will save us from these damn cicadas?
Squidward Tentacles playing the clarinet
And he's really, really bad. (But not as bad as cicadas.)