6 Products 1 Dude Swears Help to Heal Chafing

Sure, this antichafe aerosol spray ($16) is principally designed for those dudes who take cycling far too seriously. You know the types: the ones always seen wearing those goofy, low-riding helmets and ubertight spandex.

According to its website, it's the only antichafe product available in an aerosol can, so it's like the antichafe game's response to spray sunscreen. Simply genius.

After testing, I can report that you'll want to reapply every few hours as excessive skin balminess on those extrasticky Summer days can outdo even the most tough-acting of protectants.

Watch too many male-beauty-product ads and you'll see men portrayed as unrefined, sweaty Neanderthals. OK, so this is true for some. But then there's us guys who want to be viewed as dapper gentlemen. Yes, even when in relation to our perspired nether regions.

Anthony, the renowned skin care brand formerly known as Anthony Logistics For Men, has stepped up to the plate here. The label's No Sweat Body Defense ($20) is high-end, effective but not too uppity-feeling. After all, this is being applied on a man's sack.

The formula is a sweet-smelling cream that transforms into a powder when applied. It was undoubtedly the most refined of the bunch and had me feeling like one of those classy gents who spends 45 minutes in front of the locker room mirror after only working out for 20. But before I started feeling self-conscious, I remembered I was protecting myself against ball sweat. Best of all: Anthony No Sweat Body Defense left my undercarriage feeling arid and sweat-free the entire day.

As might be expected, many of the antichafing powders sampled for this experiment got their mojo from good ole Gold Bond powder. Super Powder ($16) was no exception: it's a fairly standard talcum powder that does a wonderful job of keeping the family jewels airy and dry.

I sampled this when heading out to Lollapalooza a few weeks back, and it only required one reapplication in a foul-smelling porta potty. Is it a bit messier than a spray or cream? Sure. Do you feel as if you're tapping back into your inner caveman and powdering up your man parts? No doubt. But it works.

There's simply no denying it: Buckler's is one of the best companies currently offering moisturizing products. From the brand's Daily Face Repair to its Chapped Lip Remedy, the label has made it its mission to keep skin feeling fresh. The brand piggybacked off its all-natural, superthick, nonoily hand cream and expanded its reach to other products including soaps, lip ointments, and, of course, this chapped skin remedy.

So, yes, its product wasn't specifically designed to alleviate gooch-related concerns. Nonetheless, what Buckler's lacks in preventive protection against chafing it more than makes up for once your skin has already been a bit irritated. Take it from a long-suffering dude with eczema: this product ($19) is far superior and more effective than many of the finest ladies' products being peddled by an overeager woman in your local cosmetics department.

If you're the type of guy who eats strictly at farm-to-table restaurants and prefers his music festival headliners to be bands the average person will hear about in 18 months, chances are your choice of ball/gooch powder won't be an easy one. After all, you're a curator of radness.

Thankfully, Meow Meow Tweet, a small-batch skin care company that creates vegan products with pure, all-natural, and organic ingredients, has you covered. And its Body Powder ($20) is simply top-notch. In fact, it's just as wonderful when applied to a baby's bum as when sprinkled under a sweaty sack. I didn't even need to reapply this soothing powder for an entire Summer's day out on a boat. No, my boys kicked it lakeside all day without a sweaty care in the world.

If I'm doing a packaging test, Bálla Powder ($18) wins by a landslide. The sleek black container looks like a cross between Armani Black cologne and a high-end body spray, so stocking it in your bathroom will only make you look like a much more sophisticated gentleman. As for its effectiveness at winning the war against the chafing gods? The results were mixed. While Bálla Powder most certainly did the job at protecting my junk against the Summer's nasty sweat mongering, I noticed that putting too much on caused some itching and irritation. Perhaps, though, that's simply my own inability to read simple directions.