16 Things About Kids' Vomit You Learn as a Parent

Published on April 20, 2016 at 3:35 PM

Dealing with vomit is never fun, but the substance that comes out of sick little ones is in an entirely different league. It doesn't matter if you've been supersqueamish all of your life or have had your fair share of experiences cleaning up other people's vomit; when your kids get sick, it's up to you to take care of them — and the mess. Sure, no one is thrilled at the idea of letting someone puke into their bare hands, but the more you deal with puking kids, the sooner you morph into a person who doesn't get completely grossed out. These are the 16 major truths about children's vomit that every parent comes to learn eventually.

You usually only get a few seconds warning that it's go time. When you see that look, grab that bucket!

The little ones have a remarkable talent for getting vomit in your mouth.

No matter what, they will try to avoid the puke bucket at all costs.

If it's between puking on you or the bed, they pick you.

The bathtub is your best friend for messy kids and soaking clothing.

They rebound from the puking remarkably quickly.

Backsplash is everyone's worst enemy.

When all else fails, your hands become prized vomit catchers.

Curious little hands always want to play with it.

The more they move, they more they're shaking up the vomit.

Toddler vomit is the worst. They usually give no warning and it’s partially digested, real food!

No matter how many trash cans you have or how close they are, the vomit will end up anywhere but the can — every. single. time.

The washing machine doesn't always know what to do with vomit and leaves you with a caked-on, chunky mess.

No matter what they eat, the vomit is the consistency of milky Goldfish.

Double-sheeting with multiple waterproof pads for a long night with a sick kid is the best trick you've ever learned.

You can feel totally helpless about what to do to make it better.