This Mom's Hilarious "Recipe" For Homemade Bread Is Why Our Generation Is Totally Screwed

The holidays make many of us especially nostalgic for family recipes: a grandmother's secret turkey stuffing, a great-aunt's delicious ginger snap cookies, or a mother's beloved homemade bread. Krista Ball had a hankering for just that, so she called up her mom in Newfoundland to get the recipe so she could whip up a batch herself.

Silly Krista must have forgotten that her mom, like most mothers and grandmothers, doesn't follow a recipe. That is, unless you define a recipe as a 45-minute conversation in which you end up with a list of less-than-half the necessary ingredients, no real instructions, and two unrelated tangents about another family member's cooking.

What follows is a completely non-exaggerated transcription of Krista's phone call, which is proof that it's going to take a lot of patience and even more trial and error for our generation to keep these traditional family recipes a-cookin':

Fifth time's the charm? Nope, that's never what it is.

Don't you know how to measure? Just pour it in your hand and be done with it already!

How many "glass mugs that Dad likes" are in an ounce, do you figure?

Like, seriously, Krista's mom doesn't have the time to explain to Krista how ovens work.

If Krista manages to make homemade bread even remotely reminiscent of her mother's, for the next generation's sake, we hope she writes it down. (And lets us know if it was one or three packs of yeast.)