Skip Nav
Dad's Texts to His Wife When His Kid Throws Up in the Car
Toddlers
This Dad's Texts After His Kid Puked in the Car Will Make Your Day
Kid Shopping
The Best Gifts For 7-Year-Olds in 2018
Story of a Misdiagnosed Miscarriage
Personal Essay
How My Daughter Became a Rainbow Baby to Herself

How to Negotiate With Kids at Dinner

This Heinz Ketchup Ad Accurately Depicts Dinnertime Like the Suspenseful Episode of Dateline It Is

No offense to seasoned detectives, CIA secret agents, or antiterrorism operatives, but being a parent? To a young child? That's some stressful sh*t right there.

So, when Heinz tapped a veteran NYPD crisis negotiator to help mediate dinnertime struggles, I was less than impressed. A staggering 62 percent of parents say they actually negotiate with their kids to get them to eat their dinner, so what could this Lt. Jack Cambria know that I haven't already tried?

But in the above video — which, while hilarious, feels like a particularly suspenseful episode of Dateline — he does mention a scenario that we hadn't yet even considered.

"I'm here to help in case you find yourself in a tough spot . . . like you've got kids to feed . . . and you run out of ketchup."

Oh, no.

With the help of a family (otherwise known as two parents held hostage by a chicken nugget-yielding preschooler), Cambria then outlines the requisite tactics — from "emotional labeling" to "creating a mutual enemy" — that have led to successful negotiations with some of the "toughest minds out there." Toddlers included.

Read on for more pro tips. And if these don't help, there's an actual 24-hour hotline (1-844-HEINZ11) for on-demand advice on how to negotiate with the toughest opponent . . . your kids.

From Our Partners
Essay About Why Moms Love Venting to Each Other
Christina Aguilera Tonight Show Interview About PJ Masks
Sweden's Princess Leonore at Sister's Christening
Stages of Putting Sunscreen on Kids
What Summer Is Like For Stay-at-Home Moms
Reasons C-Sections Are the Best
Why Dads Need to Do More
Why I Hate Instagram Moms
Parenting Lessons From The Real Housewives
My Son Likes His Dad More Than Me
When Kids Start Oversharing
What Is Shower Snacking?
From Our Partners
Latest Moms
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds