These days, we're so busy telling our daughters all the things they can do that we don't stop to think about the things they shouldn't. Toni Hammer, a mom of two, came up with a list of 13 "don'ts" in a profoundly touching letter she posted to Facebook. It's one that every parent of girls should commit to memory:
- Don't apologize when someone else bumps into you.
- Don't say "sorry to be such a pain." You're not a pain. You're a person with thoughts and feelings who deserves respect.
- Don't make up reasons as to why you can't go out with a guy you don't wanna go out with. You don't owe anyone an explanation. A simple "no thanks" should be acceptable.
- Don't overthink what you eat in front of people. If you're hungry, eat, and eat what you want. If you want pizza, don't get a salad just because other people are around. Order the damn pizza.
- Don't keep your hair long to make someone else happy.
- Don't wear a dress if you don't want to.
- Don't stay home because you don't have anyone to go out with. Take yourself out. Have experiences by yourself and for yourself.
- Don't hold back your tears. Crying means you're feeling something that needs to get out. It's not a weakness. It's being human.
- Don't smile because someone told you to.
- Don't be afraid to laugh at your own jokes.
- Don't say "yes" to be polite. Say "no" because it's your life.
- Don't hide your opinions. Speak up and speak loudly. You should be heard.
- Don't apologize for being who you are. Be brave and bold and beautiful. Be unapologetically you.
So, if you want to raise strong girls, please tell them not to do any of these things. And, just as importantly, make sure they order the damn pizza.