Perhaps the ultimate litmus test of how good a fit a candidate is for your family is that of how well she interacts with your kids. If things go well during your initial screening, ask if she'd mind spending 20 to 30 minutes getting to know her potential future charges. Don't hover over her, but keep an observant eye from a not-too-far distance to get a feel for her comfort level with them, and vice versa.
Will You Spend Some Time With the Kids?
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