Even If You Didn't Know the Stone Temple Pilots Frontman, This Letter From His Family Will Haunt You
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"We are angry and sad about this loss, but we are most devastated that he chose to give up," Mary Weiland hauntingly wrote about the Dec. 3 death of her ex-husband, former Stone Temple Pilots frontman Scott Weiland. While music fans and fellow artists hail the musical genius posthumously, his ex-wife and the mother of his two teenage children — Noah, 15, and Lucy, 13 — is painting a more honest portrait of "a paranoid man who couldn't remember his own lyrics and who was only photographed with his children a handful of times in 15 years of fatherhood" in a poignant letter to Rolling Stone.
Though I was never a Stone Temple Pilots fan, the brutal honesty of the letter struck me as one that any family dealing with drug addiction can relate to. It's raw, it's cold, and it's heartbreaking. Mary wrote:
"The outpouring of condolences and prayers offered to our children, Noah and Lucy, has been overwhelming, appreciated and even comforting. But the truth is, like so many other kids, they lost their father years ago. What they truly lost on December 3rd was hope."
She goes on to explain that she covered up Scott's addiction for years in order to maintain appearances for both their family and fans. Telling the tale that Scott was drug-free and on the road to recovery was just that — a tale she felt obligated to tell:
"When writing a book years ago, it pained me to sometimes gloss over so much grief and struggle, but I did what I thought was best for Noah and Lucy. I knew they would one day see and feel everything that I'd been trying to shield them from, and that they'd eventually be brave enough to say, 'That mess was our father. We loved him, but a deep-rooted mix of love and disappointment made up the majority of our relationship with him.'"
And while people everywhere tell her he's finally able to rest and is no longer fighting his demons, she isn't so sure.
"I won't say he can rest now, or that he's in a better place. He belongs with his children barbecuing in the backyard and waiting for a Notre Dame game to come on. We are angry and sad about this loss, but we are most devastated that he chose to give up.
Noah and Lucy never sought perfection from their dad. They just kept hoping for a little effort. If you're a parent not giving your best effort, all anyone asks is that you try just a little harder and don't give up. Progress, not perfection, is what your children are praying for."
Wise words for any parent — whether they're battling addiction or just trying to get through the day-to-day trials and tribulations of parenthood.