After our second failed intrauterine insemination (aka IUI, where the sperm is directly inserted into the uterus), we decided to take a long break from trying to have a baby and regroup after the Summer. But one night in June, while we were lying on the couch watching a movie, I decided we should give it a go. So instead of waiting, the next morning I called our fertility doctor to share our plan, and on July 1, I started taking fertility medication. On July 13, we went in for our third IUI.
The two weeks following the IUI, I felt so many different emotions. I was trying to convince myself that this time was different; I just felt it. I tried not to get excited, but I couldn't help it. On July 26, I got another not-pregnant result, and I was crushed. A wave of all the emotions from the last two years came crashing over me, and I fell back into my bad habits — a cycle that's hard to break.
After the second IUI, when we decided to take a break and things stabilized, I began eating healthy and working out again. I started to feel "normal" . . . and it felt great. But once we started the third round, I felt the instant shift in me. Everything I worked so hard to get back on track fell right off the emotional wagon again. This journey has been full of happiness, sadness, and sometimes gut-wrenching pain. I'm doing my best to find the lessons along the way, really embrace them, and use them to guide me to a healthier lifestyle. Here's what I've learned so far.