Spoilers for season five of Orange Is the New Black!
It's the question every Orange Is the New Black fan had on their minds after watching the season four finale: would Daya shoot CO Thomas Humphrey? Now that season five has premiered, we finally have our answer.
The episode picks up exactly where it left off in season four, with Humphrey (Michael Torpey) on his knees in front of Daya (Dascha Polanco), who's holding the vindictive corrections officer at gunpoint with his own weapon. As the other prisoners circle them and try to convince Daya to pull the trigger — especially Maria Ruiz (Jessica Pimentel), who sees the moment as an opportunity for the prisoners to take over Litchfield — Humphrey begins to plead for his life. He starts telling Daya a story in Spanish about how he used to catch frogs as a kid and that he has two sisters ("He doing that thing, trying to make her see he a person and sh*t. You know, I seen that sh*t on Oprah back in the day," Taystee hilariously observes from the sidelines).
Daya is visibly frustrated and stressed out by everyone yelling and telling her what to do, so she asks them and Humphrey to shut up. No one does, so she shoots Humphrey . . . in the penis. OK, OK, not in the penis, but really close on his upper thigh, after telling him "I don't f*cking speak Spanish." The rest of the inmates scream at her to finish the job and kill him, and then Maritza (Diane Guerrero), who Humphrey terrorized last season, starts literally kicking him while he's down. Someone impersonates the female guard over the radio, telling the other COs that the gunshot was from Humphrey "going full Sandy Hook" and shooting people. Alarms start blaring and all hell breaks loose.
Fortunately for Humphrey (not that he deserves any kind of fortune), Gloria (Selenis Leyva) and Sophia (Laverne Cox) take pity on him and try to stitch him up with needles from Litchfield's hair salon, before eventually realizing the bullet hit an artery and they need to take him to the medical ward. So, does Daya shoot him? Yes, but he lives to see another day.