Skip Nav
Woman Helps Mom With Her Daughter's Hair
Staying Sane
The Sweet Way 1 Woman Helped a Mom Struggling to Style Her Black Daughter's Hair
Harry Potter
75 Magical Gifts For the Kid Who Loves Harry Potter
Holiday
This Swear Word Christmas Packaging Is the Wrapping Paper Version of a Lump of Coal
Ellen DeGeneres
Move Over, Oprah! Ellen DeGeneres Has Her Own List of 15 Favorite Things For Fall
Gift Guide
The Best Gifts For 9-Year-Olds in 2018

I Will Never Spank My Kids

The 1 Thing My Parents Did With Me That I'll NEVER Do With My Own Child

"What your kid needs is a good, old-fashioned spanking!" Every time I hear this, it makes me cringe. Growing up in the '80s, my dad believed that spanking was a perfectly acceptable punishment for my brother and I. We weren't abused by any means, but when we really pissed our dad off, we knew a spanking was in the near future. And we hated it.

What did getting spanked as a punishment teach us? Nothing of value really, except to fear our dad's bad side. It taught us that if we're older, bigger, and stronger than someone who is making us mad, we're allowed to hurt them. It also taught us that resorting to violence is an acceptable way to resolve a problem.

I realize that spanking was a very common disciplinary measure by parents back then and has been going on for many generations, but for my family, I'm putting an end to it. I never have and never will spank my children. Instead of spanking, I take away screen time privileges, play dates, and favorite toys. Removing things they value greatly has a much more substantial impact on them than simply spanking their butts for a brief moment in anger.

By using these alternative punishments, my children fear the consequences they receive for bad behavior, but they don't fear me. They know that I love them and would never hurt them. They know they can trust me to care for them, emotionally and physically. As a parent, it's my job to provide my children with a delicate balance of nurture and structure. It's a tough gig, one that can be exhausting, frustrating, and even complicated at times, but it's also one that has a big payoff.

Image Source: Pexels / Silvia Trigo
From Our Partners
Why I Say Merry Christmas Instead of Happy Holidays
How Your Hair Can Define You Personal Essay
I Followed Through With Disciplining My Kids
Is It OK For Boys to Wear Shorts in the Winter?
Different Types of Parents There Are on Christmas Morning
I Don't Give My Kids a Toy Limit at Christmas
What Is the Happy Mama Retreat?
I Hate Elf on the Shelf
How We Celebrate the Holidays Without Religion
What It's Like When Your Child Stops Believing in Santa
Why the Holidays Make Me Sad as a Parent
Best Suit For Women Under $100
From Our Partners
Latest Family
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds