Spoilers for American Horror Story: Cult below!
Someone get Ryan Murphy on the phone, because that man is responsible for sending my blood pressure through the damn roof during this week's episode of American Horror Story: Cult. While watching "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark," I somehow surpassed the loud volume of hyperventilating I did during the premiere, waking up not only my boyfriend downstairs, but also my cat and perhaps the entire neighborhood. Do you think my therapist will accept personal checks from FX?
Anyway.
In season seven's second episode, we're treated to more creepy clown spottings. And a man dangling from a meat hook. And another terrifying encounter with Kai, who desperately needs a trip to the salon. OH, and how could we forget about that shooting?! Without further ado, let's dive into what went down this week before I pass out from fear (again).
The clown conveniently disappears before Ivy sees it upstairs. Are they real or what?!
Still, the scene of them chasing Ozzie into the bathroom is terrifying.
He's the worst of the worst.
Can't you just stalk them on Facebook like everyone else, Ally?
"We're connected Oz . . . flesh to flesh." Find God, Winter.
Harrison is an amateur beekeeper, Meadow is low-key allergic to the sun, and they're both pretty weird.
It's because it ended up being really cheap, but still.
They're the cochairs of Michigan's Nicole Kidman fan club. NBD.
"He gets one night a week in Detroit to do . . . whatever."
He's alive at first, but then she accidentally tugs him down and blood shoots out of his mouth.
It's the clowns, OK?! Not Pedro!
Yeah, this should go well.
Wasn't Ally JUST telling her therapist about how much she loves and appreciates Ivy?
This is too much.
"LESBIANS, WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!"
Truly living up to her ice-cold name.
Don't go, Pedro!
Like I said: expect a bill from my therapist, Ryan Murphy.