12 Pieces of Brutally Honest Love Advice For Your Friends Who Need to Hear It

By Nicole Yi
POPSUGAR Photography | Paul Kabat
POPSUGAR Photography | Paul Kabat

Sugarcoating things isn't always the best way to help someone in heartbreak. Sometimes, they're better off knowing the cold, hard truth. When it comes to love especially, I'd personally appreciate if a friend gave it to me straight rather than spare my feelings. It's not easy to break it to someone you care about, but you're not doing them any favors by giving them false hope after a breakup or fake dating advice when you know exactly what the problem is.

So, if you can't do it, we can for you. Here are 12 pieces of brutally honest relationship advice for those who need a dose of tough love.

For breakups

  1. Drink some wine, cry it out, and move on. You're not helping yourself in any way by sulking around in your sweats and refusing to go outside. Get it out of your system and find a way to keep yourself busy in the days, weeks, or months to come. You will feel better — promise.
  2. Delete your social media accounts now. You'll only be tempted to creep on their pages to see what they're up to. Social media is toxic and detrimental to your healing process.
  3. It's gonna suck. Strap in, because the road ahead is not going to be easy. Time is your best friend, so know that each day will eventually feel better than the last, but it's never an overnight process.
  4. Stop punishing yourself. If they can't see your value, then they're clearly not worth wasting any more of your time on. You need to realize that it's their loss, not yours.
  5. That's not a good idea. Hooking up with random people to make yourself better, binge-drinking/partying, taking up every date offer, etc. will make you feel like sh*t. You might think this is the best way to get over them right now, but you'll only end up regretting it.
  6. Accept that they might not want you back. Right now, your goal should be personal growth over trying to win them back. Focusing so hard on the latter could leave you disappointed if they end up sticking to their decision. If you really do want to get back together, give them some space instead of desperately trying to communicate with them.

For dating

  1. Stop being so thirsty. You don't need to pounce on every eligible person you come across. Know your worth and do you. By focusing on yourself, you'll attract the right kinds of people along the way.
  2. Quit overthinking it. You're self-sabotaging your relationship by trying to dissect every single text or move instead of enjoying being together. Not everything requires decoding — chill the f*ck out.
  3. Stop dating losers. You like the fact that you're no longer single more than you like your partner. It's better to be alone than with somebody who doesn't contribute to your happiness or your relationship whatsoever.
  4. Take a break from love. Instead of jumping from failed relationship to failed relationship in hopes of one finally working out, how about working on yourself for a change? It's not a reflection of you, at all, but it can be an indication that it's not the right time for a relationship right now. Seize this opportunity to do what you've been wanting to do.
  5. Nothing is wrong with you! So stop asking this question every time somebody isn't into you. It's never healthy to blame yourself. If you really want to figure out why things aren't working out, evaluate the types of partners you're dating, where you are in your life right now, your state of mind, etc.
  6. Make a relationship a choice, not a goal. Having a significant other does not validate you as a person. Ignore everyone who's pressuring you into a relationship and decide for yourself whether or not it's truly something you desire.