I Got Hypnotized to Cure My Longtime Nail-Biting Habit — but Did It Work?
It isn't every day that I find myself in a dark conference room at work, my eyes closed, repeating things like, "Good job, little Kelsey." But alas, this is precisely where I was one month ago, intermittently talking to myself as a voice on my computer guided me deeper, deeper, deeper . . .
I can assure you I'm not crazy; rather, I was getting hypnotized via video call to cure a compulsive nail-biting habit I picked up at age 5 — one that's defied 23 years of gross-tasting polish, gloves, and hand-sitting. (OK, maybe the notion is a little crazy, but hear me out.) Hence why Grace Smith, master hypnotherapist and author of Close Your Eyes, Get Free, had me address my younger self, when I first adopted the fixation.
Most people experience 90 percent improvement after six hypnotherapy sessions.
To be clear, I had never tried hypnotherapy before. My first session took me by surprise, mostly because it was completely unlike the movies. There was no waving a pocket watch in front of my face; no zombie-like trance. I simply shut my eyes and relaxed, while Smith cooed me to an altered state of human consciousness. It's highly effective too: she assured me most people experience 90 percent improvement after six sessions alone. So was I hopeful it would work? Yes. Hesitant? Hell yes.
The first course of action was to make my nail-biting conscious, which followed pinpointing the root of the problem (stress) and addressing when I tend to bite (during deadlines or after one too many cocktails). Then, we designated a replacement I could bring to my mouth whenever I get the urge (water). "The body thinks that by biting your nails, you're releasing stress and anxiety, which isn't actually true," Smith said. "The water is there to relax you."
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If video conferencing a hypnotherapy session sounds weird, that's because it is. Yet, in between floods of email pings to my inbox and shoddy internet service that interrupted my thoughts, I did reach a relatively relaxed state of mind — almost as if I were watching a movie directed by Smith and I was the lead. "Repeat after me," she echoed in the background. "I am safe. I am calm. I choose to be here." And so I did.
Later that night, I bit the nails on my pointer and pinkie fingers until they nearly bled.
We covered the same basics: breathe deeply, find your happy place, instruct 5-year-old Kelsey to sip on water at every urge to bite.
"Everybody is different," she explained during our next video call the following week. Some people find success after a single session, while others need more. Frankly, by the time we had our second — which took place at 9 p.m., while I was lying in bed — I had already been awake for 16 hours. I was just worried I'd fall asleep when I was asked to close my eyes.
Still, we covered the same basics as our first session: breathe deeply, find your happy place, instruct 5-year-old Kelsey to sip on water at every urge to bite. Surprisingly, however, my overtired state actually helped me relax: by the three-minute mark, I found myself sinking into an alternate universe, floating around as I so pleased.
I must have fallen asleep when the call ended, because I woke up two hours later, confused. It's hard to say whether it was the result of the hypnosis or my lack of sleep from the night before, but that evening I slept more soundly than I ever had before.
The next day, I opted to get my nails done in an effort to boost my odds of kicking the habit — not that I truly needed it. Over the next three weeks, any time that I found myself reaching my hands up toward my mouth, I'd pause. It wouldn't stop me from nibbling on the nail, of course — and I certainly never thought to reach for water, probably because I can barely remember to keep a bottle at my desk — but I never bit down, and I think it's because I was finally becoming aware of what I was doing.
I'm also aware that curing a long-standing habit won't happen overnight, so I'll be booking another session should I ever fall off the nail-biting wagon. Like building meaningful relationships or growing a plant, all good things in life take time. As long as it's not another 23 years, that sounds just about fine to me.
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