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Amy Schumer Quotes About Her Wedding February 2018

Of Course, Amy Schumer's Wedding Vows Were NSFW — Did You Expect Anything Less?

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Amy Schumer shocked her fans when she tied the knot with chef Chris Fischer in a surprise beach wedding on Feb. 13, but the comedian is finally ready to open up about her new married life. During a podcast interview on You Up With Nikki Glaser on Monday, Amy said "it feels f*cking good" being a wife. "I'm a wife as hell. But it's still like a novelty," Amy gushed. "Somebody went to sit next to [Chris] and he's like, 'My wife is sitting here,' and I got back and he was so excited to tell me that he said that. I just have been really overusing it to a degree that's insane. Like, when it's completely uncalled for."

While Amy is definitely enjoying married life, she also admitted that there is still one thing she's going to miss about being single. "This show is called You Up, right? I don't think I'll get a text like that again," Amy joked. "You know what I mean? And that made me really happy, but also really sad."

Amy and Chris dated for almost three months before tying the knot, so why the rush? "Part of the thing that's good about us getting married so quickly is that we're so in love," she said. "Every girl I know, if they get proposed to they're like, 'Oh now? Now that I can't have kids!'"

The comedian also shed some light on what their vows were like. "Mine sucked! I thought mine were good, I wrote mine in 20 minutes," Amy explained. "I was crying when I wrote them, but his blew me out of the water so hard. In my vows I go, 'But I promise I'll keep going down on you, even though everyone tells me I won't.' And his were like, heckling me too. He was like, 'The other day I lost a tennis match and you called me a f*cking loser.' It was all like awful sh*t. All his stories about me that were supposed to be endearing were about me screaming at him. I just annoy him all day . . . And he's like, 'I'm spending my life with this worthless monster?'" You've gotta love Amy, right?

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