For a single mom, the holidays can be daunting on multiple levels. If she's sharing her children with their other parent, the pain of missing them at the holidays can be hard to deal with. If she's not sharing them, she might be feeling overwhelmed with the pressure of her own life, plus the pressure of the holidays. Let's not forget the financial difficulties that may present themselves to a single parent and the struggles a single mom may come up against when coparenting with an ex. More than ever, moms, your single-mom friends need you, whether it's to join you on the holidays or perhaps to just be a willing ear to listen to what's going on with them.
Single moms are often sharing children with a coparent or perhaps they're on their own with the kids during the holidays. The merriness of the holidays would shine brighter if a friend invited a single mom and her children or a single mom whose kids are with the other parent to come over for holiday fun. The Inviter is the friend who extends the invite for a single mom, willingly and with an open heart. The Inviter isn't asking her single-mom friend for anything but company and perhaps some cookies or appetizers for sharing while celebrating the holidays.
The Intuitive friend knows that the single mom could use some help, but she won't ask because she's stubborn or ashamed or doesn't want to put anyone out. Whatever the reason, the Intuitive friend comes over to help watch the kids so the single mom can holiday shop, or perhaps this special friend sends the single mom a present or bottle of wine to help give her a little bright spot in her holiday. The Intuitive friend may offer to help with holiday decorations, or perhaps if the single mom is really in need, the friend may donate her gifts or gently used toys and clothes to the single mom's children for the holidays. No matter what kind of help it is, the Intuitive friend knows how to be there without making the single mom feel like she's being a burden.
The Buffer knows that her single-mom friend is not getting along well with her ex, and so she tries to be there to listen and offer an ear to help her friend get through this rough patch. If her single-mom friend needs to interact with her ex with whom she has a strained relationship, the Buffer friend may show up to keep the atmosphere more neutral instead of tense. The Buffer may offer to watch the children or help out at home in an effort to eliminate her single-mom friend's need to ask her ex, which means less tension and interaction with a tumultuous ex.
The Social Butterfly
The Social Butterfly refuses to accept her single-mom friend hunkering down at home and isolating herself. The Social Butterfly takes time out of her busy mom life to make a fun girls' day or girls' hour even to get her friend out. Even still, the Social Butterfly calls all the ladies and asks for their help in dragging out their single-mom friend. The Social Butterfly makes a single mom glad she got out and dusted herself off to have some fun!
The holidays can be a magical time, but they can also be a sad or stressful time for many of us. Don't let single-mom life or stressors get to you so that you don't find any magic in this season. For your sake and your kids' sake, employ new and old holiday traditions with your kids and loved ones and make the most of it whether your bank is broke or you're making decent bank. Let any ex drama fall by the wayside, and take the higher road. Relish in the joys of this season and shove away all of the materialism and drama aside. As a powerful single mom who's in charge of her life 100 percent, you deserve a little sparkle and jingle.