I hate to break it to you, but someone will be watching you on the toilet and in the shower for the next couple of years at least. As soon as toddlers gain the dexterity required to turn a knob, they see a closed door as merely an obstacle to overcome. Even if you lock it, there will be pudgy fingers creeping underneath and incessant inquiries of, "Hello? What you doing in dere? Are you pooping?" But really, this is a good thing. Because if you take your eyes off them long enough to drop a quick deuce, you risk emerging from the bathroom into a world of spilled flour or scribbled-on walls. (Toddlers are quick and destructive, yo.) No matter if they're in the midst of an epic tantrum or ruining your expensive mascara or asking nosy questions about your private parts while you're just! trying! to pee!, remember the most important thing of all . . .
