7 Things I Wish I Had Known About Potty Training

It's a potty training reality we must all face. Be prepared for worst-case scenarios during this process. When your child has an accident, What to Expect community member pregosaur suggests, "Say in a neutral voice, 'We had an accident, let's clean it up!' Good luck." This way, you're being matter of fact about cleaning it up, but you're not shaming your kiddo or making him feel bad about having an accident.

People tend to bristle at the suggestion that we should bribe our children, and I do understand, but the promise of something fun (such as stickers or a couple of M&Ms) works miracles when trying to get your child to even sit on the potty. My pediatrician recommends mini M&Ms: a few for sitting, a small handful for pee, and a boatload for pooping. For community member Sboelig who has had potty training success with her child as early as seven months old (!!), "When they go potty, you celebrate, followed by a single M&M….we did that and now she doesn't even ask for a treat but I do tell her how proud of her I am and celebrate." So don't worry that you will be buying M&Ms like it's your job — eventually they'll realize that no treat is necessary.

If you have started potty training and your child is having a ton of accidents, tears, and overall just not getting it, there is no shame in setting it aside. You don't want to make your kid hate the potty or develop stress and anxiety from it. According to community member 3timesaround, it's best to just hold off. "Wait until they are really, really ready," she says. "Wait until they are rejecting diapers. If you start and it's just not clicking, it's okay to stop and try again later." To which I say, where the heck were you four years ago, 3timesaround? Because I could have used this advice when potty training my third. She took twelve months of tears (mine) and finally a $100 Build-a-Bear excursion. (If you've ever wondered who buys all those accessories, it's moms of kids who finally potty train after a full year.)

Instead of using one of those mini potties, which can be an absolute beast to clean, buy a fitted seat and a stepping stool. If you have to spend your days dealing with pee and poop, at least save the step of slopping it out of a miniature toilet. (That sounds gross, because it absolutely is.) Laytonb, a community user who has trained her two boys and is embarking on training the next one says, "We barely used a toddler potty. It was better to start with the big one and use a stool." By avoiding the mini potty, you can also teach your child that flushing doesn't have to be scary.

One of the most difficult parts of potty training for me was getting distracted by other tasks and forgetting to bring my kiddo to the potty on the regular. Use the kitchen timer and set it for 15 minutes in between each trip. It's a complete pain, but this way you are more likely to catch your child before they have an accident.

My house is not a nudity-friendly place, but if you can tolerate it, letting your child go Donald Duck (no bottoms) can make trips to the potty much easier. There's no need to fuss with pulling off pants and underpants, just hop right up on the potty. Community member jeanettelogan reports, "No underpants really helped my guy grasp the concept of potty training." There's definitely more motivation for parents when there's nothing between their child's tush and the carpet as well.

My oldest was my earliest daytime potty trainer, but she wore nighttime pull-ups through Kindergarten. My second, on the other hand, took his sweet time, but once he was done, he was done. No accidents during the day and dry at night. In fact, nighttime and daytime potty training are completely different. Nighttime control is all about physiology, so don't get frustrated if you need to keep up the disposables at night for a while. Pregosaur encourages other members, saying, "You don't have to train for both at the same time." And really, aside from taking some precautions like going before bed and skipping large drinks at night, there is no nighttime training possible.

Potty training is pretty much the worst, second only to changing diapers. But if I can do it successfully, anyone can. Take your time, be gentle on yourself and on your child, and things will fall into place before you know it.


Related stories:
Real Moms Describe Potty Training in Just 3 Words
Finding the Best Potty Seat For Your Toddler
Signs Your Toddler Is Ready to Be Potty Trained