What to Talk About on Your First Date After a Divorce

If you're about to head out on your first date after a divorce, it might feel like jumping into the deep end without a swimming lesson. The good news is you won't actually drown, and you will be absolutely fine. Remember that everyone is nervous on a first date, whether he or she is divorced or not. First dates are anxiety inducing for just about everyone, and you're not the first person to go through a divorce and feel nervous once you're ready to dip your toes back into the dating pool.

The reality is you have to start somewhere, so whether you end up having chemistry with your date or not, look at it as a learning experience and try to enjoy it! Dating is supposed to be fun. It's about meeting and mingling with different people and learning about the way someone else views the world. Instead of fretting over whether this person will be "the one," just focus on this person being "the fun" you need to have for that day or evening. And maybe — just maybe — that first date will turn into a second one.

With this positive attitude, take along with you these 13 tips on what to talk about on your first date after a divorce, so you can keep that good energy rolling . . .

01
Books You’ve Read or Sites You Enjoy Reading
StockSnap | Shopify

Books You’ve Read or Sites You Enjoy Reading

Steer clear of politics — unless your beliefs are so deeply entrenched that you can't be with someone who thinks differently than you do — and talk about books or sites you enjoy reading instead. You can learn a lot about someone by what he or she reads. Whether it's the New York Times or ESPN or a novel, your date's reading habits are telling and can also lead to good conversation.

02
Your Meditative Lifestyle
StockSnap | Matthew Kane

Your Meditative Lifestyle

If you can't get enough "ohm" from your life and you enjoy meditation and yoga, you should share this with your date. First, it's a great way to see if this person might have a similar lifestyle as yours, but second, if you're passionate about something, your energy and excitement will shine through!

03
Your Besties
StockSnap | Katie Treadway

Your Besties

Talk about the people you love the most, in the best way. Your date doesn't need to hear all the dirty details but would like to know who you enjoy spending time with and how your friends are involved in your life.

04
Your Artistic Endeavors
StockSnap | Allef Vinicius

Your Artistic Endeavors

Whether you like to do woodwork or enjoy painting, share examples of how you like to get creative with your date. You may find common ground, and it is a great place to jump-start a conversation. You can show pictures of your work, too, if you're feeling bold.

05
Your Travels
StockSnap | Claudel Rheault

Your Travels

This is a conversation that is neutral and drama-free . . . well, usually. Any info on where you'd love to go or where you're planning to visit next is a great way to find common ground.

06
Your Sense of Humor
Unsplash | Tanja Heffner

Your Sense of Humor

It's not like you can "talk" out your sense of humor, but you can share comedians/comediennes who you find really funny. Share things that make you smile, whether it's a TV show, hilarious memoir, sarcasm, or what have you. It's interesting to learn what makes one person laugh . . . or what doesn't!

07
Your Family
StockSnap | Andrew Branch

Your Family

If you have kids . . . some people will say don't talk about them. Sorry — I disagree. I will say, don't talk about them ad nauseam. Your date is trying to date you . . . not your kid(s). Not yet, at least. But talking about the family members you are close to is a good thing. I would save any family drama, though, for a different date — not date one!

08
Your Education
StockSnap | Caleb Woods

Your Education

Did you go to college? Are you particularly proud of your alma mater? Share about your school experience, whether it's high school, college, or beyond. Experiences you have in school and your education are things most people can relate to.

09
Your Last Concert
StockSnap | Yvette de Wit

Your Last Concert

This can be a serious question, especially for us music-lovers. Who did you see on tour last? Do you dig shows? How often do you go? Are you a musician, too?

10
Your View on the Outside
StockSnap | RawPixel

Your View on the Outside

Do you love the great outdoors? Or perhaps you prefer binge-watching shows on Netflix from the comfort of your couch for days at a time. Share how much you embrace the outdoors and getting out there in nature. And if you wouldn't camp to save your life, well, you can share that, too!

11
Your Social Life
StockSnap | Phil Coffman

Your Social Life

Are you a social butterfly, joining every cause and every party? Or do you prefer sitting back in a small group? This is a good conversation to have on your first date postdivorce!

12
Your Fitness Habits
StockSnap | energepic.com

Your Fitness Habits

Can't stand exercising? Or are you a gym rat? I think talking about what you enjoy doing in terms of activity level is important. For me, I am very active and want someone who is as well, so putting out the feelers right away tells me if I've got a fitness buff on my hands or not.

13
Your Pets
StockSnap | Lerkrat Tangsri

Your Pets

Diehard dog owner? On "Team Cat?" Love all furry friends? Share your love for your four-legged friend. This way, if your date is antipets, you know it's over before you even get the check!