1 Mom's Letter to Her "Second-Born Baby" Captures Our Mixed Emotions Perfectly

As a secondborn myself, I swore I wouldn't make those same stereotypical "mistakes" my own mother made with me. I would appreciate every moment, cherish every milestone as if it was the first time I witnessed it. I would fill out the damn baby book.

But here I am, six months into life with a secondborn, and she doesn't even have a baby book, never mind my undivided, fully present attention. Thankfully, she's not alone, and neither am I. Rasha Rushdy — author of The Tuna Chronicles blog — wrote a poem to her secondborn daughter on her first birthday back in December, and it's bubbling up again, with good reason.

Her words fully express those mixed emotions we moms feel when we can only give half our energy but somehow manage to fill our hearts twice over. Read her sweet love letter to her secondborn baby below, and if you decide to read it to your own child — a hand-me-down poem that you didn't write yourself — don't feel guilty for a single second. It's what we do.

My secondborn baby,
I have to tell you the truth.
One day you'll probably ask me
About why everything wasn't
Bright, shiny and
New
For you.

And when you ask me,
I will tell you the truth;
The truth about
The hand-me-downs,
The caffeine and soft cheese
During pregnancy,
My lack of a birth plan,
And weekly bump photos;
The fact that I didn't wait
With bated breath
For every single milestone.
The difficult truths
Like the fact that
You had to cry more
Wait more
Share more.
The fact that I,
Your mama,
Was often not the best version of myself.

But dear, sweet, secondborn,
Let me also tell you this.
The truth is,
Before you were born,
I doubted the infinity of love
And yet
The moment they placed you in my arms,
Cocooned in blankets,
With your button nose and scrunched up lips,
Eyes firmly shut and so new to this world,
It's as if
I grew
A whole new heart
Just for you.

The truth is,
Darling girl,
It was you who taught me
To really believe
That despite the guilt, the worry,
The urgent need to be everything to everyone,
That in fact, I am enough, as I am.
Yes, I was already someone's mother
When you came into my life
But you made me
A better one.

And so, the truth is,
Dear secondborn,
When one day you start to wonder why
Things were different when you came along
Know this, my love:
I never knew
How much my heart could hold,
Until I held you;
How you weren't an addition,
But a piece that was missing;
And how now that a year has passed,
After everything we've been through,
The love and joy
You have brought
Makes me feel
Bright,
Shiny
And new
Every day.

Happy first birthday, baby.