Laugh Through Your Tears With Joan Rivers's Best Quotes on Beauty

"I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery."

"The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found."

"My body is dropping so fast, my gynecologist wears a hard hat."

"I'm sure some of you are wondering whether my breasts are real. Let me just explain to you. This one is, this one isn't."

"My face has been tucked in more times than a bedsheet at the Holiday Inn."

"When you reach a certain age, hair grows on a woman. I've got 5 o'clock shadow on my ass."

"I've had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware."

"Looking 50 is great — if you're 60."