An Ode to Timothée Chalamet's Chiseled, Sharp, and Sexy Jawline

Updated on 1/18/2020 at 5:50 PM

Captain America's shield, Jennifer Lopez's ginormous engagement ring, my cold, dead heart — what do all of these seemingly random objects have in common? Impenetrable as they may seem, they could easily be sliced and diced by Timothée Chalamet's razor-sharp jawline. The actor possesses many qualities that make him attractive — that boyish charm, those dreamy green eyes, that bouncy hair — but his most swoon-worthy physical attribute by far is that chiseled, carved-by-the-gods jaw.

I've had a *thing* for jawlines since 2006, the year Channing Tatum fueled my sexual awakening in two cinematic masterpieces: Step Up and She's the Man. Sure, his abs and biceps were front and center in both films, but I found myself thirsting over the actor's jaw as he danced alongside Jenna Dewan and played soccer with Amanda Bynes. Channing's jawline unfortunately hasn't maintained its defined nature through the years, leaving the door wide open for Timothée to swoop in and steal the title of Sexiest Jawline in Hollywood (still love ya though, Chan).

I know I'm not the only one who finds Timmy's jawline indescribably sexy. Simply search "Timothée Chalamet jawline" on Twitter, and you'll find that dozens of like-minded individuals consistently share their thirsty thoughts on the actor's finest facial trait. As one Twitter user aptly wrote, "timothee chalamet's jawline could single handedly take down the patriarchy and that's that on that," and honestly, that's not even the most impassioned observation out there. To help stoke the flames of Twitter's already-fiery obsession, I've scoured the internet to find the best photos of Timmy's gloriously sculpted jawline, for your viewing pleasure. Kindly proceed with caution, and thank me later.

Quick question: if I printed out this photo and put it in a frame, would his jawline pop out and break the frame's glass? I'm sincerely concerned.

When I perish, I would prefer the cause of my death to be impalement by Timothée's jawline.

What's that? Oh, you have a can of tomatoes you need opened? Never fear — just use his sharp jawline as a can opener.

Live footage of Timmy and his jawline on their way to steal your significant other.

Y'know that bulletproof glass that protects the Declaration of Independence? Yeah, that stuff is no match for this piercing jawline.

That sparkly harness, that smirk, that jawline, I'm overwhelmed. Jesus, take the wheel.

I hereby declare this photo illegal in all 48 contiguous states.

Even with that questionable mustache, all I can focus on is his jaw — and that's saying a lot.

When he goes through airport security, does he have to disclose his jaw as a certified weapon? Just curious.

This photo is the reason I wake up in the morning.

Same, Florence Pugh . . . f*cking same.

Oooof, seeing that jawline in black and white just hits different.

I probably would've done a lot better in math class if I'd used Timmy's jawline as my own personal protractor. That's probably a solid 107-degree angle right there, right?

"Here, let me show you my best asset." — Timothée, pulling back his hair to reveal his jaw, probably.

My god, the way the light is hitting that jaw is just *chef's kiss*.

Did he have this jawline at the moment of birth, or was he a chubby-cheeked newborn just like the rest of us? I have a sneaking suspicion the former is the case.

And on the seventh day, God said, "Let there be Timothée Chalamet's jawline."

Phew, this man has been genetically blessed.

Have a wheel of cheese you need sliced? Don't take it to the deli; Timmy's jawline can do that for you, free of charge.

This is the be-all and end-all of celebrity jawlines.

I wouldn't mind retaking Anatomy 101 if there were an entire lesson dedicated to this one-of-a-kind jawline.

Hey Timmy, did it hurt when you and your flawless jawline fell from heaven? LMK, please.

Please excuse me — it's time to take a cold shower.