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Funny Story About Having Sex After Kids

Mom's Hysterical Recount of Attempted Shower Sex After Kids Is Too Real

"PARENTHOOD Constantly being touched and climbed on by my toddler and non stop nursing from my baby.... When is there...

Posted by Breastfeeding Mama Talk on Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Parenting is a wild ride, and if we can't laugh together, we'd all be crying. This TMI story about attempted shower sex after kids is a perfect example of one of those "laugh so you don't cry" situations, and we are certainly cracking up. Shared on the Breastfeeding Mama Talk Facebook page, the story begins by discussing the reality of having kids who always need something from you, giving you and your partner — who you may or may not feel like you're in "best friend mode" with most of the time — very limited time to yourselves.

"Omg! I am not sure when the last time we actually had sex when the kids were up?!" the story begins, and it only gets more relatable from there.

We (I) fed the family, washed the kids, brushed their teeth, put jammies on them, and tucked the kiddos in bed early. I ran to the bedroom, turned off Blippi, and turned on romantic music. Found the lighter from my 2-year-old's birthday party and got the dust covered candles lit. I attempted to be sexy, ignoring my postpartum naked body society frowns upon. I know he loves every inch of me.

We get into the warm shower that is quickly loosing heat because my kids took most of the hot water. Kissing passionately in our shower we seem to hear phantom cries of our children about every 30 seconds. Trying to catch our footing, we hear a loud "SQUEEEEEEEEEEK!" I start cursing the toy dolphin under my breath. As we are desperate to keep the mood going, we realize the alphabet toys below us . . . we are surrounded. Finally, we both crack up and the sexual mood disappears. We get back to best friend mode, laughing so hard we are barley able to catch our breath.

The couple decided to snap a photo of the shower floor to remember this hilarious moment and to remind themselves that "parenting is a crazy ride." The post ends with a note to all parents: "I believe if you can't truly enjoy your kids and laugh you will never survive being a parent. So here's to the exhausted moms and dads out there trying to be parents, every minute of the day attempting to get some together time. Laugh at life or you won't make it! "

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