The Expectations vs. the Realities of Mother's Day

Mommy's going to sleep as long as humanly possible on Mother's Day morning. Forget breakfast in bed. Let's make it lunch in bed.

Blame it on being a mom and your body just naturally waking up early, or blame it on the fact that your kids and husband are being incredibly loud as they make you breakfast. So you're wide awake staring at the ceiling — but hey, at least you're still in bed.

An artfully decorated breakfast tray filled with Mommy's favorite a.m. goodies and, of course, a giant pot of coffee.

Of course they will want to join you. And eat your bacon. And spill your coffee. And put cartoons on.

Any knock on the door on Mother's Day leaves you wondering, who could it be? Perhaps the local florist with a big, beautiful bouquet?

All those knocks were actually your order of diapers from Amazon. You did get flowers, but they were direct from the grocery store. You might be a little peeved until you find out your kids picked these out just for you.

A handpicked card, handwritten with the perfect words expressing how much you are appreciated as a mom. It brings you to tears.

You had one job. One job.

Mother's Day will be your day to take your time getting ready. You'll be able to spend as much time as you want in the bathroom — and you'll even get to pee alone.

You can spend leisurely time putting around in your bathroom when your kids are in college. Until then, get used to the audience — yes, even on Mother's Day.

A glorious, uninterrupted bubble bath. We wouldn't be upset if there was also candlelight, wine, and spa music.

At least someone got to enjoy a bubble bath.

Sometimes all we really want is one good family photo that we can frame and cherish for years.

A family photo is much easier said than done, especially on Mother's Day. The good news: you'll cherish the one capturing your reality just as much.

Ah, a day spent splurging at the stores. Maybe a little window shopping. And a budget? Oh, not today.

Sure, you're at CVS and you're buying Pedialyte, saltine crackers, and stain remover, but hey, at least you're able to coupon alone.

The man in your life will take it upon himself to get and wrap gifts not only for you, but also for his own mom.

He got the gifts, yeah, but if you could wrap all the gifts, that would be great. Thanks!

Time to see if all those hints you dropped were actually picked up.

While a Tiffany's box is nice (and always an option for next year), handmade jewelry can't be beat.

An appointment for a spa day has been booked. You'll be getting pampered all day long. This is what Mother's Day is all about.

Did someone say paint nails? Your toddler would LOVE to get her nails painted just like Mommy. How can you say no to that? It might not be as relaxing as you expected, but it turns out to be loads of fun. Now this is truly what Mother's Day is all about.

Mother's Day would be a great day to pick up that hobby you forgot about. Paint, read, garden . . . oh, the options are endless.

For most of us, our hobbies take a backseat to our kids' hobbies — and Mother's Day is no exception. It's more than likely that your kiddo is going to have a swim meet, a baseball game, or a first communion on your day.

Mother's Day will be a day for Mom to sit back without having to lift a finger, and she'll bask in the delight of not needing to clean.

Sure, you didn't lift a finger, but you definitely will cleaning up from all the Mother's Day festivities on Monday.

The irony of Mother's Day is that it would be really nice to be able to spend time with our kids without all that pesky mommy-ing that needs to be done. Just sit back, sip your coffee, and let someone else deal with tantrums, fights, bath time, and diapers.

Because you are Mommy, there really is no break. Not even on Mother's Day. When your toddler is thirsty, he will still want Mommy's kind of water (i.e., he wants Mommy to get it), and he'll still require you to put him to bed (even if your partner is more than willing and able). Think of it this way: you are really loved, Mama.

Perhaps this is the year your spouse will book a romantic trip for two to some glorious, warm spot.

As wonderful as a kid-free getaway sounds, when it comes to Mother's Day, the only place you want to be is surrounded by those who made you a mom in the first place.