While Joan Bremer was recovering from miscarrying her first pregnancy at seven weeks, she made a permanent decision — she was going to get a tattoo to mark this life experience.
Despite it being a tragic time, Joan felt that it was important to honor her unborn baby with ink and immediately started thinking about options. "For me, all the tattoos I have signify something, and even though this was a painful time, I still wanted to be able to remember it in some way," Joan told Today.
Just days after the miscarriage, Joan went forward with a simple yet powerful design of two hearts within one connecting mother and child. "If we are able to carry a baby to term and have a healthy child, I will add a rainbow baby to this design since 'rainbow babies' are babies that are conceived after a loss, just like how something beautiful can come after a storm," Joan explained. "If I end up having a second miscarriage, I will most likely add another heart to this design."
The California woman shared her new tattoo on Imgur not only as a way to express her grief, but also as a way to help others. "Losing a baby, even if it's early in pregnancy, is just so difficult," Joan continued. "I know there is a certain silence about miscarriages and pregnancy losses, but I am not ashamed that this happened to me. That was one of my motivations for getting the tattoo in the first place — I really think it's healing to be able to talk about it."
Since posting the snapshot online, others have taken comfort in her honesty and are sharing their own memorial tattoos. "This is so incredibly common, but it's not a subject that people want to talk about," Joan added. "It happened to us, and it's happened to countless other people. I want to be able to share and talk about it, and in talking about it move on from the pain and disappointment."